Page 123 of Start With A Slap

I know what it’s like to have a sorry excuse for a mother,Sever had said.

“That night, I wake up choking. She’s got her scarf around my neck, tied like a noose. Apparently I’m the devil’s spawn and it’s her mission to scare my demons out.”

A chill ran through her bones as every missing puzzle piece snapped into place, and as she predicted, dreaded, what he’d say next:

“She drags me to that altar, and she starts whipping me. Choking me. Sticks this...thingin me.” Shuddering at the memory, his tone shifted from anger to despair. “‘Til I cried, and begged her not to kill me.”

Ivy felt his fear, saw him trembling there. He was just a little boy, and he thought he was going todie.She got out of bed and cautiously approached him.

“Then all of a sudden, she breaks down crying, cuts me loose. Suddenly she’s sorry. Some bullshit about me being ‘God’s child’; her ‘angel’; her ‘only love’...” He inhaled, exhaled and announced bitterly, “And then she sucked my dick.”

His knuckles were white from gripping the edge of the bureau. She tried to touch his hand, but he withdrew.

“Next day, I tried to tell him,” Jason said. “Know what he did?”

Ivy shook her head.

“He shoved me against a fence and said, ‘It’s over. Be a man. Let it go’. Never said another word.”

Her eyes fell closed. “Because it happened tohim.” Repeatedly. “Just like you, he wanted to forget?—”

“Fuck him! If it happened to him, why would he send me there? Why did he set her off? He wanted it to happen to me!”

“No! He made a mistake. A horrible, stupid mistake.”

“There are no mistakes! He wanted me to suffer because he hated my mom, end of story. He’s exactly likeher.”

“No, baby, no!” She cradled his face. “God, what you’ve been holding in all this time...”

“Shut the fuck up!” He tore her hands away and suddenly he’d pushed her hard against the bureau, shouting, “Don’ttalkto me like that! I’m not your ‘baby’, I don’t want your fucking pity or your psychobabble, I knew you’d do this if I told y—” He gasped, noticing that his fingers had closed around her neck.

Ivy stared at her husband in shock.

Eyes widening, Jason let go of her, let the bureau fall back into place, and stepped back. Hands opening and closing, whispered to himself, “Fuck me.”

Ivy watched him rummage through his drawer. “Jason...”

He shook his head, looking queasy, and stepped into his jeans. “I gotta... I gotta get out of here.”

“Where... Where are you going?”

“Away from you.”

“Away from...” Her voice got strange and small. “Please don’t leave me.”

He searched her eyes as if he wanted to say something, then left the room.

After he was gone, she sank to her knees in front ofSunflower Xuntil the dog came over to lick her tear-streaked face.

Ivy slept fitfullyon the couch that night, television on, phone by her head in case Jason called. He didn’t.

She’d really gotten more than she’d bargained for, hadn’t she? It served her right, coming toSever’sdefense... Not that she deserved to be throttled.

Or slapped.

Yeah. They had a lot in common, those two. More than she’d ever known.

She looked at her phone again to check for missed calls. There were some from Sever, in the days before that fateful, rainy night.

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