Page 5 of If You Dare

She manages a small smile and a brief flash of eye contact before she leaves the room. She doesn’t hug me or dissolve into tears like she did last year. I am her only child and her greatest disappointment.

Aneesa frowns out the door after her. “Everything okay with your mom?”

Maybe she somehow doesn’t know about the accident. Diamond University is a sprawling campus that draws plenty of international and transfer students, but Diamond is still a small college town. There’s nothing they love more than gossip or a murder mystery.

Except there’s no mystery with this one. My best friend died. I’m the one responsible. Case closed.

The only mystery is how I got away with it.

“Yeah. Fine,” I tell Aneesa, busying myself with making my bed. “Just family stuff.”

Aneesa is on her feet in seconds, helping me. A lump forms in my throat at the small kindness. “Is she still upset with you over...what happened?”

I should’ve known there was no way anyone on this campus might not have heard about the worst moment of my life. About the worst thing I’ve ever done. I was an idiot for hoping I might be able to start fresh with someone. That I might at least have a few hours feeling normal before somebody told her the truth about me.

That she better watch her back because apparently I like killing my roommates.

“Yeah. She pretty much hates me,” I tell her, pushing the emotion back down before it can bubble up and explode.

I know, deep down, that my mother doesn’t actually hate me. She loves me unconditionally. But she hasn’t looked at me the same since that night. She probably never will.

“I’m sure she doesn’t hate you,” Aneesa insists. “It was an accident.”

“It was stupid. I was drunk. I wasn’t thinking straight, and someone died because of me. I ruined the lives of so many people. Her family, my family. I don’t blame any of them for hating me. They should.”

Chloe’s blood is on my hands, and I still haven’t figured out how to wash it off. My skin will be stained with it for the rest of my life.

Aneesa drops the bedsheet and faces me. “I can’t even imagine what you’re going through,” she says, voice gentle. “But...you can’t punish yourself forever. That won’t do you or anyone any good. It won’t bring your friend back.”

Tears prick my eyes, and I can’t bring myself to say anything because if I try to talk, I’ll sob, and I am not sobbing in front of my roommate during our first time meeting each other. I focus on making my bed, and Aneesa lets silence fall between us.

When I’m finished, she grabs her lanyard. “I was just about to go get lunch. Do you want to come with me?”

She knows the worst thing about me and she’s still willing to be seen with me in public. I don’t even want to be seen with me.

“Sure. Thanks,” I tell her.

She’ll come to her senses soon. When she notices the stares as everyone’s eyes follow me across campus. When she hears all the whispers and finally gets sick of being friends with the murderer.

But for now, I give her a grateful smile for the kindness I don’t deserve.

* * *

Wes

“Wes,that's your fourth plate of pancakes this morning.”

“I’m in training, Mom.” I shovel in another bite even though I haven’t been hungry since my sister died.

Across the table, Mom shakes her head. She could always see right through my bullshit. She slips on her jacket over her blouse. She can’t stay here any longer dealing with my mopey ass—that bank’s not gonna manage itself. “You’re lingering so you don’t have to leave for campus. You can’t avoid Violet forever.”

I stiffen. I fucking hate hearing her name.

From his spot in front of the stove, Dad flips the last of the pancakes. He’s still got his pajama bottoms on. A retired NHL player who coaches in the afternoons. “You know she’s just as upset about Chloe’s death as we are. You need to figure out a way to forgive her, son.”

I don’t know how the fuck either of them can say that.Forgiveness. The last thing Violet Harris deserves. She killed my sister. She ruined our lives. They knew Violet less than a year. Welcomed her into our home and our family with open arms. Now their daughter is dead because of her, and they’ve just...forgiven her.

I’m the only one in this house whose fists clench at her name. She deserves to die for what she did. At the very least, she deserves prison time. Lots of it. But she didn’t even get that.

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