Page 92 of Perfect Chemistry

She had washed her make-up off, and I could see the faintest hint of freckles across her cheeks. I was mesmerized by her. Every movement, every expression, pulled me in deeper and I wasn’t sure that I ever wanted to be freed.

“Sorry,” she mumbled, taking a sip of the scotch. “I hope you don’t mind if I borrowed your clothes.”

“No, not at all. Eh-hmmmm,” my voice cracked, as I tried to subtly adjust my growing erection.

“Kai,” she whispered, “I am not the girl that you fell in love with anymore. I am so broken inside, I don’t even know how to function most days.”

“You are-” she silenced whatever words were about to come out of my mouth with a look.

“I lost my husband, a man that I loved more than my own life,” she confessed. “I don’t even know if my heart can handle another heartbreak, Kai. The thought of feeling that loss again scares the shit out of me. I don’t sleep most nights, because I have-” she stopped and looked at me. I watched her drink down the remaining scotch in her glass before pouring a second glass and bottoming it down as well.

“I have really bad PTSD. I can hide it most days, but I really am fucked up. I was admitted to a hospital. There was therapy, medications, the whole nine. I couldn’t bring myself to care. Not for myself. Not for anyone,” she continued quietly. “I can’t handle any more loss,” she said, her voice beginning to break. “It will kill me.”

Her tears started to fall again. I wanted to give her space but I couldn’t. Not when she was trying so hard to be open with me. I walked around the island and pulled her into my arms and just held her, caressing her back and whispering that everything would work out. We didn’t have to figure everything out tonight. We didn’t even have to make promises of forever right now.

This was enough.

Standing in my kitchen, holding her in my arms was enough for me right now. I didn’t want to fuck this up. I didn’t want to wonder ′what if’ any more. I just needed a little hope, and that would be enough.

When I felt her breathing calm down, I pulled back a little to look at her. I cupped her face in my hands and wiped her tears away with my thumbs. I had never seen this vulnerability in her eyes. She really expected me to break her heart. She was scared to let me in again, and it hurt me more than I realized it would.

“Katie,” I whispered against her forehead as I gave her a gentle kiss. “I won’t rush you. I won’t push you unless you tell me to. I won’t do anything that you don’t like. Just tell me that maybe, maybe there is a chance for this. That will be enough. I don’t need yes, just maybe.”

Katie’s arms were wrapped around my waist and she hugged me tighter, burrowing her face into my shoulder. I almost didn’t hear what she said, so I asked her to repeat it.

“Maybe,” whispered out so quietly from her lips but it hit me like a bullhorn had sounded off.

I hugged her tightly and spun her around in my arms. She squealed and slapped my back to make me stop. “Stop before I puke!”

I set her on a bar stool and searched her eyes one more time. She said, ’maybe.’ I couldn’t stop myself and kissed her lips. I wanted her so much right now I could devour every morsel of her mouth. She gasped, and my tongue began exploring her mouth and dancing with her tongue. She tasted like the scotch we drank, and I was getting drunk from the feeling of her legs wrapping around me as I feasted on her lips.

I pulled back and tried to control my breathing. “Come to bed with me. We’ll just sleep. My dick hates me for saying this, but we can just hold each other tonight. That’s enough. Ok?”

She looked relieved that I wasn’t going to push for anything further. Tonight had exposed too many emotions. I wanted her to want to be with me, not feel pressured because of sex. I was going to accept my blue balls, and be what she needed tonight.

We crawled into my bed, and I pulled Katie into my chest so that her head rested on my shoulder with one arm draped across me. I pulled the blanket up over us and just held her until she fell asleep.

She said, ‘maybe.’ I could work with, ‘maybe.’ I closed my eyes and drifted off.

* * *

Warm hands were stroking my cock. It was so hard, I felt like I would burst at any second. I felt a warm wet sensation dragging up my shaft from the base to the tip. It was a tongue licking me like an ice cream cone.

I groaned from the pleasure of it, and reached out to force that mouth down onto my cock. To take all of it in against that warm tongue and suck it dry. I involuntarily rocked my hips against the warmth, desperate for the release.

* * *

Katie’s POV

I woke to the sound of Kai grumbling in his sleep. I tried to sit up to see if he was okay, but he pulled me back into his arms so that my entire backside was pressed against his chest, my ass tucked up against his groin.

He ground his hips against my ass, and I felt how incredibly hard he was. He kept rubbing his erection against my backside, and I would be lying if I said it wasn’t a massive turn on.

After some quiet coaxing, I got him to lay back on his back and I lay across his body with my legs slightly straddling him. I needed to wake him up. I refused to take advantage of a sleeping man, no matter how erotic his grunting and groaning may have been.

“Kai,” I whispered against his cheek and nibbled his ear. “Wake up, I need you.”

I ground my sex against his erection and moaned at how good it felt. “Kai,” I said a little louder this time. “Please. I need you.”

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