Page 99 of The Billionaire

26

My hands trembledas I buttoned my denim shirt up over my maxi dress. It was one of my only shirts where I could actually get away with not wearing a bra. My breasts hurt so bad I couldn’t even barely wear a wireless bra, a sports bra, or a camisole lace bra. I winced as I buttoned the last button. Damn, my breasts hurt! I didn’t know they could hurt so bad.

I trailed my fingers through my minimal jewelry; my long staple pieces always did the trick. I chose a coral long necklace and draped it over my neck.

No.

Yellow.

No. Nothing. Ugh, I couldn’t make up my mind!

I spun to the side and placed my hand over my lower stomach.

Is there really a baby in there?My stomach felt absolutely the same. Flat. Everything felt the same. Well, scratch that. That’s not entirely the truth. My breasts hurt like hell, and I couldn’t get over the horrible nausea. I felt sick from not only the physical feeling of being pregnant, but I felt awfully sick from nerves. How was I going to tell him? I mean, sure I was going to see him in less than a few hours. No big deal.

Hell.

I’m pregnant!!

I’m hormonal, which probably explains the reason for my outlandish outburst. I would have to apologize for that. I felt horrible. Awful. But I couldn’t fight the feeling of being scared. Alone. I could raise this baby alone and continue medical school. I figured out how to go to medical school in the first place, I’m sure I would figure out a way to continue. With my new baby.

With a baby that was sure to remind me of him every day.

Where did we stand?

All I wanted to do was run into his arms, tell him how sorry I was. Did I ruin everything? I let an entire month run by, days filled with costly presents delivered, completely blowing him off.

When he didn’t answer my first call, or my first text, I thought he never wanted to see me or talk to me again.

But when he finally answered me, I couldn’t believe it.

He asked if he could pick me up, but I couldn’t bare to ride in a car together, filling in silence by blurting out I’m pregnant before saying I’m sorry. So after streets with traffic, I finally made it to the bistro I adored right off the beach in Malibu.

This beach always made me feel better no matter how crappy I felt. The fresh salt water, the constant soothing waves. Lost in my thoughts, I propped up my chin on my fist, gazing into the sea.

My lust thoughts. My memories.

The special times we had together in the water. How much fun we had with no cares in the world. Would I ever feel like that again? I mean, having a baby changes everything! What would he say? Would he… would he still be attracted to me? Would we be still together? Like together together. Not linked by a human carrying our DNA.

I shuttered in absolute fear. I took a sip of Sprite, feeling sick. I had to calm down. This constant worrying cannot be good for a baby. For…a little girl possibly. I ran my fingers through my hair. This is crazy! Shit. I mean, no cussing! I have to watch my language now. She or he can hear my every word.

The skidding of the wicker chair snapped me out of my freak out zone. I exhaled as I finished trailing my fingers through my hair. His look said it all. He was intrigued by my emotions. I’m sure I looked like a basket-case.

“You look…beautiful.”

Electricity shot up and down my body as every feeling came rushing over me. Fear, desire, lust, sadness, longing, regret, compassion, love.

Nervously, I tucked a tendril of hair behind my ear. “Look, thanks for meeting me.” I tucked another tendril behind my ear before exhaling. I played with the bottom of my shirt and re-crossed my legs.

“Look I feel—”

He reached for my arm and stopped me. The touch sent shivers through my body and I felt every sensation all over.

“No, no. I lost my cool. I snapped. I couldn’t believe I let myself get so angry like that. That’s a chapter of my life I despise and never want to revisit. I’m sure.…” He cleared his throat, and I could see the obvious hurt in his eyes. It made me sad. I wanted to wipe it all away for him, take away the hurt, the fabrications. All the stories. How awful would it be to have lies upon lies printed about you, written about you forever published in the forever database of Google?

“I’m sure you get it.” His grip was tighter on my hand. “But, it wasn’t okay. Flipping out like that. I….” He retracted his arm and bit down on his thumb before running his hand through his hair. “I promised myself not to ever lose my shit again. I hadn’t faced those emotions in such a long time. But how I reacted was in no way acceptable. It was a lot of pent up anger, and I did not act like a gentleman. I made you feel threatened. I haven’t been pushed like that in years.”

“I’m…sorry.” It was barely a whisper.

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