Page 18 of Broken Hearts

“Why do you ask that?”

Marilyn sighed. “Because I think that you have us moving for a reason. I want to know what is really going on. Don’t tell me anything untrue either, because I won’t believe you. We could have stayed at the B and B. Why would this place be better?”

I scoffed. “This place has history. It’s our history, Marilyn, and I thought that you would want to be a part of it.”

Marilyn just looked at me and said that I didn’t know what I was talking about. “I know what this place was to us. I think that it has very little to do with that. What are you keeping from me?”

She asked me directly, which meant that it was really hard to lie about it. I didn’t want to lie; I wanted to use the right words and make it happen that way. That wasn’t going to be the case though. Instead of trying to use the right words and lie, but not lie, I just figured that the truth was the best thing that I could do. It wasn’t like I wanted there to be another reason to focus on, but I wished there was.

“I don’t think that the fire at your place was an accident or a faulty wire. I think it was arson, which means only one person as far as I am concerned. I don’t know Jesse, but I have seen his rap sheet, and I know what he is capable of. Yes, I wanted you away from all of that, and I thought that getting you out and about would be a good way to guarantee that he doesn’t get to you. I said that I was going to keep you safe, and I mean it. I really want you to be okay.”

“I do feel safe.”

That’s all I wanted to hear. A small part of me was sad to hear that she felt safe. Would she feel safe if she knew that Jesse was following us as we speak? Would she want to know that he was a few miles away from our location right now?

She didn’t need to know, and I would certainly not be telling her so. I didn’t want Marilyn all freaked out. I wanted her to be calm, and she wouldn’t be if she knew that her ex was trying to chase us down and do God-only knows what to us. I didn’t think it was going to end well, but I tried to consider the upside. It could end well, if Jesse did what I expected him to do, and timing was on my side.

I held her and we talked for a while longer, but the magic was taken with some of the truth creeping in. It was the last thing that I wanted to do. I could have sworn that we were going to be able to forget about him for a time, but it wasn’t going to happen. Jesse was close, and I was going to have to deal with him. I knew one way to ensure that he wouldn’t be messing with Marilyn again. That was the sort of problem that the old me could take care of just fine. Soon, I would have to distance myself for a while and find out just how much of it I was willing to do. Knowing me, it was a lot.

Marilyn suggested that we go in. She had a twinkle in her eyes and that meant only one thing. Ever since being her first, Marilyn was ready for it all the time. It was hard for me to focus on anything else, so Dale’s call was going to have to wait. I was sure that there was something more to talk about, but that wasn’t going to do her any good. Marilyn wanted to forget one way and who was I to stop her? I wanted her badly as it was.

When we got into the room, Marilyn was already getting undressed. It would seem that Marilyn was a quick study. She knew once those clothes came off, there was nothing I could do to stop what came next. I was lost in the moment, my eyes taking in her perfect body and already getting prepared to please us both. I moved toward her with no hesitation.

Later that afternoon, we both decided to get some air, and Marilyn was the first to suggest that we keep on moving. I’d figured that we would stay here for the night, and I would go pay Jesse a visit when Marilyn went to sleep. It wasn’t a make-or-break plan, but it was certainly what I had my mind on. If we kept moving, that meant that I was going to have to wait longer to end all of this. Could I wait any longer? That was going to be a hard one.

I wasn’t going to deny Marilyn the will to keep moving. She said that she just had a weird feeling and wanted to keep going. She was right, her body was right, so, of course, I wanted there to be a time where the truth would come out. I wanted her to rely on her gut reaction again, so she had to know that she was so right. I just couldn’t tell her, not yet.

We drove all through the day and late into the night. When we were getting gas, I was able to check my phone and I had a couple of messages from Dale. He was likely going to tell me that Jesse was on the move. I hadn’t seen him, but I’d felt his presence. It was hard for me to focus on much of anything when I got back to Marilyn. I wanted to tell her what was going on, but I had to keep it in. Keeping things from her was hard. I didn’t want it to be this hard. I didn’t want to keep things from her. Nothing that was currently going on was what I wanted, and that very fact annoyed me.

Since I was exhausted, Marilyn wanted to know if she could drive. I didn’t want her to but had no real good reason to tell her no. That meant that instead of slowing down for the night and lying together, we were going to keep going. I wanted to take care of Jesse, but I couldn’t tell her that. I tried to talk her out of it without working as much, but Marilyn wasn’t going for it. We were going to keep going, and I’d lost my chance to make things easier. Now, I would have to keep going and keep him tracked. He could give up and I’d lose my chance, but I couldn’t worry about that.

“If you get tired, just pull over and wake me up, Marilyn. Anything strange or you have a bad feeling, just let me know what is going on. Okay?”

I got a bit of a dramatic look like I was being too much. I was, but that didn’t change how I felt about any of it. I was thinking of Jesse and hoping that he did as I wanted him to. I fought to sleep for a while, but the lull got to me finally, and I couldn’t help but fall asleep.

My dreams took me back to a familiar place. I was back in the room and before I could get a good look at anything new, I had that damn rag thrown over my face. I knew what I would get, by where the rag was placed. This time, I knew to expect water to come in and even as I told myself not to panic, I did. I couldn’t help the fear that rose in me. Even though I knew that they weren’t trying to kill me, I knew that they could. After a time, I would wish to die, just so that I would have some certainty. Drowning by tiny drops of water was a mind fuck. I could feel air all around me, I was swimming in it, but I couldn’t get to it. I couldn’t get it in my lungs and that was the worst feeling.

Like in the gym when I was working out, each drowning was a set, and they would do several of them at a time. Questions would be asked, but most of it was still not questions that I knew the answers to. I would have told them whatever they wanted to know, I tried to, but neither one of us could speak the other language. My awards and honors were all because I had shitty linguistic skills, something my mind liked to taunt me with when I was there. It was now reminding me of such things, and I couldn’t say that there was that much to it.

Electricity was used next, then just normal savagery. I couldn’t think straight then, or in my dreams reliving it. Everything hurt and even though I knew it wasn’t real anymore in some respects, I’d been saved, I wallowed in it longer than usual. The dream was more powerful than usual.

16

Hal

Icame to and my head hurt. It was dark in my sight, except for a small stream of light that blinded me. I wanted to figure out what was going on, think of something that made sense, but only a face came to me. It was Marilyn, a smile, concerned as it was, and then her lips were moving, but I couldn’t hear it. I blinked and time moved forward. When I opened my eyes again, I had more sight, but I was just as confused with what I saw. Marilyn was sleeping next to the bed. I called her, but nothing but a croak came out.

“Hey there.”

I made a motion for water, and she helped me drink. “Are you okay?”

I agreed that I was sore, disoriented. Part of me was afraid that I was going to travel in time again to the future.

“What happened?”

Marilyn looked down and said that she ran off the road not too long after she went to sleep. I could tell that she was disturbed about it. She looked like something was off with her, but I couldn’t understand what it was. Did she think I would be mad at her? I wasn’t.

“Okay, it’s alright. You okay?”

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