Page 193 of Redeeming 6

“Please don’t hate me.”

“I don’t.”

“I’m so sorry for not telling you sooner,” I cried. “For you having to find out like you did.”

“Listen to me.” With his hands on my cheeks, and his fingers tangled in my hair, he forced me to look up at him. “Don’t apologize. I get it, okay?”

“You get it?”

“I get it.” He nodded slowly. “Why you didn’t tell me. What you were trying to do. I don’t like it, but I get it.” He exhaled a shaky breath. “I’m just so fucking sorry for being the kind of person that you felt you needed to protect when it should have been the other way around.”

Unable to tear my eyes away, I watched as Joey absorbed the brunt of the metaphorical ax that I had just swung down on his neck—on his entire world. I could see it all in his eyes. Everything he wanted to say, everything I wanted to say, but never would.

All of the fear.

The regret.

The hurt.

The guilt.

Expelling a pained breath, Joey lowered his face to mine and gently rested his brow against mine. “I’m so sorry, Molloy.”

Tears spilled down my cheeks, and my breath came in short puffs as I reached up and covered his hands with mine. “I’m sorry, too, Joe.”

“I don’t know what to say here,” he admitted in a hoarse tone. “I’m scared to fucking death right now, so I can only imagine how you’ve been feeling. But I’m here, okay?” He shrugged helplessly. “I’m here and I’m going nowhere.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” He nodded slowly, eyes locked on mine. “I won’t run.”

“You swear?”

“I swear,” Joey replied, tone laced with sincerity. “I won’t leave you alone in this.”

“Then that’s all you need to say,” I sobbed, nuzzling his cheek with mine. “Because that’s all I need to know.”

59

I’ll Be There

JOEY

Having had a grand total of seventy-three minutes to get my head around the fact that my girlfriend was housing an atomic fucking bomb inside her belly, with fifty percent of my genes, I held her in my arms and tried to comfort her, while my brain freewheeled into overdrive.

The fuck were we going to do? We were still in school. She had her whole future in front of her. She was supposed to go out in the world and leave her neon-colored mark on it. Instead, I had saddled her with a baby.

A baby!

Jesus Christ.

It was like I was watching my worst nightmare unfold around me, and I was too paralyzed to stop it. The knowledge that I was singlehandedly responsible for ruining her future was crippling.

Well, you finally did it, asshole, a voice in my head taunted, you finally came full circle and turned into your father.

Feeling too much in this moment, feeling too goddamn exposed and vulnerable, I tried and failed to steady myself. It was pointless. The panic and uncertainty thrashing around inside of me was unlike anything I had experienced before.

I could feel Molloy’s anxiety. It was palpable. It mirrored mine.

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