Page 54 of Late Nights

I gave her an exaggerated pout as I stood. “But you’re wearing yoga pants.”

She tried not to laugh but failed. “Go,” she chuckled, pointing toward the door.

I did as I was told, pretending to be put out, when in reality, I was feeling both happy and excited to be able to tease her and hang out with her.

She made us hot chocolate while I went to go get two heavier blankets to stave off the cold temperatures outside.

I met her in the kitchen, where she sat down the two mugs filled with hot chocolate on the counter. She held her hand out for a blanket, but I ignored it. Instead, I took the blanket and wrapped it around her back. I pulled the ends of the blanket to the front, keeping a hold of the edges. Being this close to her and seeing how cute she looked all wrapped up in a faux fur blanket had me wishing I could kiss the tip of her nose.

That thought surprised me. I’d never had a thought like that before. Usually when I was with a woman it was all about having a good time, having fun, and not being alone so I could keep certain thoughts at bay. But with Demi? I was experiencing a whole new level of feelings. Like the ones that had you wanting to kiss a woman’s nose because she was so cute. The ones where you just wanted to hold her in your arms to enjoy the feeling of having her close. Or the ones that ran deeper than attraction or chemistry—not that we didn’t have both of those—that came from a place of tenderness.

Tenderness? Kissing tips of noses? What had gotten into me? It’s not like we had watched some sappy love story. No, we’d watched a movie that featured killing, not kissing. I couldn’t blame these thoughts on anything but how Demi made me feel.

Her eyes looked up at me, seemingly surprised by the gesture. I finally let go of the blanket and took a step back, wrapping a blanket around myself. I was giving her mixed signals all over the place, but I couldn’t seem to help it.

She handed me one of the mugs, and then we went out into the frigid night, sitting on the same couch, our backs to each arm rest so we could face each other, our legs stretched out side by side.

I took a sip of the steaming hot chocolate. “Thank you for making this for me.”

“Thanks for being willing to brave the cold with me.” She took a sip from her mug. “I love nights here. They’re so different from San Francisco. Look at all those stars.” Her head tipped back as she looked up at the black sky.

“Yeah, it’s pretty incredible,” I said, but I hadn’t even looked at the sky yet.

She must have heard something in my voice because she stopped admiring the stars and gave me a disbelieving look. “You haven’t even looked at them.”

“I prefer my view.”

The glow that came from the lights in the kitchen shone just enough through the windows to see her cheeks turn pink.

“Cannon,” she chastised, but there was no real anger in her voice, a smile now on her face.

“What?” I asked with a smirk.

“For someone who says it’s better for us to be just friends, you don’t seem to want to act like one,” she pointed out.

“That’s not true,” I argued even though it was totally true. “Friends tell friends they’re good-looking. West tells me all the time how handsome I am.”

That had her laughing, bringing a smile to my face. “Okay, let’s keep this going. When you’re with West, do you also tickle him? Do you often find yourself on top of him? Do you hold his hand while watching a movie together? Or how about almost kissing him?”

I lifted my mug to hide my smile before taking a sip. “I’d rather not share that information.” She made a valid point, but I wasn’t going to acknowledge it.

She nudged her foot against my leg. “Oh, whatever,” she chuckled. “You know I’m right.”

“In my defense, you’re a lot prettier than West.” By continuing to joke with her, I hoped to keep our conversation light.

She smiled but returned her attention back to the sky. “Over the last ten years, we’ve come here a lot together.” She paused and then looked at me, her expression going serious. “I have so many memories with you in them but no real memories with you.”

A heaviness settled over me, as thick as the blanket I had wrapped around me, the light mood effectively gone.

I hadn’t ever put words to whatever our relationship had been before she’d taken West’s room in our apartment, but her description fit perfectly. Any happy memory I had from the last ten years involved either West or his family. But I’d always kept Demi at a safe distance. First, I had been too scared to let another person into my life. And then second, I had been too scared to actually get to know her because I had already been having a hard time not thinking about her.

Now that I’d had the chance to get to know her better, I realized I had been right to be scared. I liked her a whole lot more now. My feelings went beyond attraction or a mere crush.

“I know what you mean,” I said softly.

“This is the first trip when we’ve actually made memories with each other.” She looked down inside her mug, as if maybe she was avoiding my gaze.

I was the only one to blame for us not becoming friends sooner, but I still thought it had been the best way to handle it.

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