Page 30 of Secrets Of Blackwood

“Shit, Damien. This is serious.” Ethan never minces words, but the gravity in his tone now is like an anchor dragging me further into the abyss.

“I know.” The room feels colder, as if the menace in that text is seeping into the very air around us.

“Have you considered,” he starts, then hesitates, weighing his next words carefully, “that maybe being with Lily is more dangerous for her than anything else?”

His question is a punch to the gut, stealing my breath. It’s the very battle that’s been raging inside me since the moment I let Lily get too close. Each memory of her—the softness of her skin, the warmth of her lips—convinces me that she’s worth any risk. But Ethan’s words ignite a flicker of doubt, fanning it into a flame.

“Of course, I’ve considered it,” I snap, the frustration evident in my voice. “You think I want her hurt? You think I haven’t been tormenting myself with the same thought?”

“Then what are you going to do?” Ethan challenges, stepping closer. His eyes are unyielding, demanding an answer I don’t have.

“Protect her,” I say, the resolve hardening my voice. “I’ll protect her with everything I have.”

“Even from yourself?” There’s a gentle accusation there, a nudge reminding me that sometimes the greatest danger comes from within.

“Especially from myself.” A truth I’m coming to terms with.

Ethan nods, clapping a hand on my shoulder in a show of solidarity. “We’ll figure this out, man. We always do.”

But as he leaves me alone with my turmoil, I’m not convinced. This time, the stakes are higher, the game deadlier. And it’s not just my life on the line—it’s Lily’s. My Lily, who deserves a world of light, not one shrouded in darkness.

Resolve settles heavy in my chest. No matter what it takes, I will shield her from the storm that’s brewing. Because without her, there’s no calm, no peace. Just an endless tempest raging through my soul.

5 - 6

The hushed tones of Lily’s voice drift through the cracked door, and I freeze, my heart stalling in my chest. I hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, but her words, laced with concern, seep into my consciousness, rooting me to the spot.

“Damien is… different,” I hear Melissa say, her voice carrying a tremor that didn’t match the fiery spirit I know her for. “I mean, do you really know him, Lil? The guy has shadows in his eyes like he’s seen some serious—”

“Stop it, Mel,” Lily cuts in, and I can almost picture her bright blue eyes clouding over with defense. “He’s not like that with me. He’s gentle, and when we’re together, it’s like—”

“Like you’re the only two people in the world?” Melissa’s skepticism is a cold slap to my already wavering confidence. “That’s how they get you. Guys like him, they have layers, and not all of them are as pretty as the ones he shows you.”

A lump forms in my throat, and I press my back against the wall, away from their sight. Melissa’s words sting, a stark reminder that my past could poison every good thing in my life, including Lily.

It’s almost unbearable, standing there, the weight of uncertainty crushing me. I need air. I need space. So, I turn away from the door, from Lily’s soft defense and Melissa’s harsh truths, and stride toward the one place on campus where I can breathe: the secluded garden.

Bursting through the foliage, the scent of jasmine and wet earth immediately wraps around me like a comforting embrace. The vibrant hues of the flowers stand in sharp contrast to the gray tumult churning inside me. Here, in this sanctuary, I can pretend for a moment that the outside world doesn’t exist.

I sink onto a wrought-iron bench, letting the serenity of the garden envelop me. Birds chirp their evening songs, the sound soothing yet failing to silence the discord in my mind. My hands clench into fists, grasping for a solution that remains just out of reach.

If only I could be what she needs, what she deserves. But how can I offer her peace when all I’ve ever known is chaos? How can I promise her safety when danger clings to me like a second skin?

“Damien,” I murmur to myself, a futile attempt at grounding. “Get it together.”

But the truth is, I’m scared. Scared of the damage I could inflict on Lily with my mere presence. And the more I think about it, the harder it becomes to separate my desire for her from the fear of tainting her world with mine.

“Protect her,” I whisper into the growing dusk, the vow hanging heavy in the air. Protect her, even if it means protecting her from myself. It’s a promise that feels both like salvation and a sentence.

The garden, with its tranquil beauty, stands in silent witness to my resolve. Here, surrounded by life in its purest form, I steel myself for the inevitable darkness that awaits. Because no matter how much I yearn for the light, I am, and always will be, a creature born of the shadows.

7 - 8

The shadows lengthen around me as I take a steadying breath, the cool air of the evening brushing against my skin. The garden’s serenity is a cruel contrast to the storm raging within me, but it’s here, amidst the whispering leaves and the scent of jasmine, that an unwanted memory claws its way to the surface.

I’m back there again, in the dimly lit alley where everything changed. Rain pelts down, mixing with blood on the pavement. Alex, my closest friend back then, lies motionless, his eyes wide with betrayal. “Damien,” he gasps, a single word laden with accusation and disbelief. My fists had felt like sledgehammers, my rage uncontrollable. I hadn’t meant for it to end this way; I only wanted to scare him, to set him straight. But fear and power had danced seductively within me, and I succumbed.

“Forgive me,” I’d whispered, but forgiveness never came—Alex didn’t survive the night. The guilt has been my shadow ever since, a relentless reminder that I’m dangerous, that I bring destruction to those I care about. Lily… she can’t be another casualty. She’s light and hope in human form, and I am the darkness that could consume her whole.

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