Page 140 of Ask Me Something

“Because I screwed up everything. I not only went against Josh’s advice, but I put the company in jeopardy. And let’s not forget the NASCAR pitch that got punted to you last minute because I had to be in New York first thing instead. Lucky for me, Josh resolved the first problem and you stepped in and fixed the second one.”

“He doesn’t want you to quit.”

“I know, but that’s because he’s my best friend, not because he’s thinking as a boss.”

I was absolutely shocked that Brian would believe this. “You can’t be serious.”

“I am. Take our friendship out of the picture, and I would’ve been fired. Hell, I might not have been given this job to begin with.”

“You’re crazy if you think the only reason Josh hired you or wants to keep you on is because you’re his best friend. You’ve helped him build this company. There isn’t one person who knows you or works for you who believes you have the job because you’re the friend of the owner. You earned it.”

“That’s not what my mother thinks.”

How could I never have picked up on his vulnerability when it came to his career? Had I been so selfish in my own insecurities that I’d never supported him through his? It would appear so. “Your mother would also like nothing more than for you to drop me. Are you going to listen?”

“I don’t have to. You dumped me, remember?”

I exhaled heavily. “I was kind of a sucky girlfriend for the couple hours I wore that title in public, wasn’t I?”

His lips curved into a small smile. “I wasn’t going to win any awards, either, keeping the truth about Tryon and Vanessa from you. You should know, I really did want the break from work. I didn’t think that Vanessa would actually say anything over the weekend to let you know. That’s part of what set me off too. I still can’t believe she made it so personal toward you.”

“Yeah, well in the spirit of that, I should tell you that the last time we met one-on-one, she asked me if I was fucking you either now or in the past. I denied it, but I’m pretty sure, like you, she could see it on my face.”

“And you’re only now telling me this?” His frustration was evident.

“It was a personal attack, and you had a lot going on with Juliette at the time, but I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have kept it from you. And obviously you should’ve told me about her coming to see you.”

He regarded me for the longest time. “Apology accepted and given right back to you.”

How could I stay mad when we had both been picking and choosing what to tell one another at some point? “You’re going to have to withdraw your resignation, you know.”

He arched a brow. “Are you really going to quit a job you’ve worked your ass off for if I don’t? Your career makes you happy.”

“You make me happier, Bri. And if that means we’re both in the unemployment line because you don’t realize how great you are at your job, then so be it. I’m pretty stubborn when I want to be.”

His eyes widened with my admission. “You realize that for someone who professed not to be Sasha-B-Fierce, you’re doing a damn good impression of her at the moment.”

“Turns out she may have rubbed off on the real me over the years.” I hadn’t given myself enough credit that she was part of my personality all along.

He stepped closer. “Tell me what you said on the phone earlier.”

“Before I do, you should know what you’re in for. I’m serious when I say there’s a lot you don’t know—”

He cut me off with a kiss. “I need to hear that you love me.”

“I love you, Brian.” I watched a shudder run through him. “But—”

He put his thumb to my bottom lip. “No buts. Do you really think I don’t know you, Sasha Jayne Brooks?”

My breath caught with the seriousness of his voice.

“I may not have known that you had anxiety attacks or what initially triggered them, but I do know that it makes you even fiercer. The fact that you’ve battled an anxiety disorder your whole life is remarkable. You think that I don’t know what that must’ve cost you, how many times you must’ve fought it, and how lonely that must have been. But now that I do know, it only makes me more in awe of you.”

His hands held my face so that our gazes were locked. “Bri—”

“I know you. How you listen to Titanium or other chick empowerment music before your pitches. That you go home on Friday nights after the gym and become a hermit until Saturday with some sort of chocolate indulgence. How you like to hear the bad news before the good because it’s easier for you to trust the bad. I know that you love the beach when it’s winter or early in the morning because it’s where you can clear your head. And I know you told me you don’t believe in fairy tales or happily ever after, but fuck if I’ll accept that.”

A tear slipped down my face. “You don’t see anxiety disorders or panic attacks in fairy tales.”

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