Page 26 of Orc's Desire

“Dilacs—”

We speak at the same time, each of us overrunning the other. She chuckles as do I, both of us shaking our head.

“Go ahead,” I offer, gesturing towards her with my glass.

“No, you,” she says. “Please.”

I swallow, having been hoping to avoid this for a little while longer. Fate has other plans it seems.

“Okay,” I agree, sipping more. I need all the help I can get to steel my resolve. This is going to be the hardest thing I have ever done. I want her, need her, and am certain in the deepest part of my heart that she is the one I am meant to be with, but I cannot do that to my brother. “We can’t do this.”

“We, uh, you,” she stumbles over words with wide eyes and shaking her head. “We? This?”

I close my eyes. If I’m looking at her I won’t be able to say it. My will is not that strong that I can possibly see her pain and confusion and not cave in to what we both want.

“This,” I say, my throat is so tight the word is barely a grumbling whisper. “Us. Khiara…”

I trail off unable to finish the thought.

“You don’t want to hurt him,” she says then her hand is on mine. Small, delicate, but warm and soothing as she traces circles on the back of mine.

“No,” I nod. “I don’t.”

“Me either,” she whispers. “But…”

I open my eyes. “But?”

She bites her lip, staring at her hand on mine, then she looks up and meets mine.

“I don’t think I can,” she whispers, her eyes glistening. “Not, that is.”

My throat clenches tight. My heart is pounding and a chilly sweat trickles down my back. I don’t know what to say because any words other than me too are going to be a lie. A partial lie, a white lie perhaps, but what does it matter because the lie is the lie.

“What do we do?”

Anguish fills my head. I don’t want to hurt Khiara but how am I supposed to live without being with her? Kissing her. Touching her. Knowing her in every possible way. Especially when she is right here, so close, yet I am to not touch her? Not have her?

Her face is a mirror for my own. Her lips tremble, her eyelids flutter over those beautiful glistening orbs. She shakes her head side-to-side, raises her hands then dropping them. My arms ache with the need to take hold of her and wipe away her tears. Hold her, safe and warm, until she feels it, knows it in the deepest parts of her heart.

“What if… no,” she closes her eyes and swallows hard.

“What?” I ask.

She doesn’t open her eyes and her voice is almost broken, shattered with the weight of emotions.

“Could we… hide it?” she opens her eyes as she clenches her jaw and nods. “We don’t want to hurt him. I know it, you know it, but what if…”

She leaves it hanging.

“When the time is right,” I offer.

“Yes!” she says, moving forward almost as if she was pulled into me by gravity. “Now is not the time. There is so much,” she gestures with one arm, “it’s terrible timing. All this going on.”

“We’ll have to be… careful,” I offer. “He already sees it.”

“Of course,” she nods, biting her lower lip and my cock is instantly rock hard. I want her with an intensity and need that it is all I can do to not grab her and race her to my brother’s bed upstairs. “But if we’re careful. Just until things are less tense. The riots, the quakes, it’s a lot.”

I nod, but my will crumbles and hers must at the same time. We rush into each others arms and I sweep her off her feet, spinning her around as our lips come back together.