Page 25 of Wish We Were There

Taylor laughed; for an instant, Parker’s eyes flickered down to look at his lips when he smiled, then back up at his eyes. “I’ll drink to that. Cheers.”

They clinked their bottles together, and each took another sip; Taylor’s was nearly empty now. They weren’t strong drinks by any stretch of the imagination, but it was enough for him to feel the beginnings of a slight buzz—enough that he could trick himself into being brave, he hoped.

He glanced up again. Parker was still watching him. The other man turned away nervously when Taylor caught him looking, but Taylor kept his gaze fixed firmly on Parker, trying to figure out what he was going to say.

“Parker, I...” he stammered. Parker’s gaze turned right back to him, his eyes attentive, despite the slight flush rising in his cheeks. “I, um, I really do appreciate this... Everything you’ve done for me.”

His warm brown eyes nearly glowed in the soft light as he smiled back at Taylor. “I’m happy to help.”

“I...” Taylor started again, but couldn’t find the words. Did he need them? Surely Parker felt it, too? He bit his lip anxiously, and Parker’s gaze dropped down to his mouth.

Mustering all his willpower, Taylor leaned forward and kissed him. Parker jolted with surprise, first at the touch of their lips pressing together, then again as Taylor’s free hand clasped Parker’s forearm. For a moment, the other man was completely motionless—then a faint, broken sound escaped from the back of his throat, and he kissed Taylor back.

Heat erupted across Taylor’s skin, centered around the electricity of where their lips met. His heart was still pounding, no longer with anxiety, but from the way each one of his nerves lit up at Parker’s responsive touch—the ghost of his rapid, needy breath on Taylor’s skin as they kissed. It made him feel like he could do anything. What had he been so afraid of?

But it lasted only a moment. Parker pulled away, taking a full step back and causing Taylor to stumble off-balance as they abruptly parted. His face was flushed, lips glistening in the soft light of the bar, but his eyes were wide and almost fearful. Taylor froze, doubt creeping up the edges of his consciousness all over again.

“Taylor,” Parker stammered. “Why—Why—Why did you do that?”

Taylor’s mouth worked silently for a moment, trying to find the words that would make Parker’s face go back to the sweet, enthralled expression he’d had before.

“Because I—I wanted to,” he finally blurted out. “I thought you did, too.”

Parker was silent for a long moment, eyes still wide. He didn’t deny it, but that only made Taylor feel more unsure of what was happening.

Finally, he croaked out, “We... We shouldn’t do this, Taylor.”

“But—” Taylor stammered. His heart felt like it might fall out of his stomach. “Why not?”

“This is so wrong,” Parker said, finally turning away as he scrubbed an anxious hand through his hair. “I shouldn’t... I couldn’t do this to you, to Zach. Fuck, I introduced you guys. I shouldn’t want you—want this.” His face had grown more flushed the longer he spoke, his nervous movement a stark contrast to the steady resolve growing in Taylor’s chest.

This was it. He had to tell the truth.

“Zach is gone,” he said, his voice coming out hoarse. “He’s dead. If we both want this, then that’s all that matters.”

“It’s only been, what, three, four months? This feels way too—way too soon, Taylor. I would feel terrible... And if people thought—” Parker protested, still not meeting Taylor’s eyes.

“No, it’s been more than four months. Zach and I...” Taylor said. Despite everything, he couldn’t stop the stab of pain in his chest as he forced the words out. “Zach and I were going to get divorced.”

Chapter Ten

Parker

Then

Parker kept telling himself that he was only nervous because it was a little weird to be driving the cute guy in his poetry class to his friends’ parents’ house so he could play piano in their garage. Right? The whole situation was kind of funny. So if he felt nervous, that was the only reason.

Taylor seemed a little nervous too, sitting quietly in the passenger seat as they made the drive up to Zach’s parents’ house. Which was understandable. He was probably worried about whether Zach would let him join the band. Why else would he be nervous?

Parker turned the music up a little louder, hoping that would fill in the awkward silence between them more effectively. At least it wasn’t too long of a drive.

When they got off the freeway, Taylor finally looked over at him and said, “So… what’s your friend’s name again?”

“Oh, uh, his name’s Zach,” Parker stammered in reply, turning the music back down. “We went to a lot of the same shows in high school, so when we started recognizing each other, we talked and hung out a few times, and found out we were going to the same college. We actually live on the same floor now.”

“What’s he like?” Taylor continued. Parker considered it for a moment, unsure of the best way to describe Zach.

“He’s cool,” he finally answered. “He’s really friendly and outgoing. And he goes to a ton of shows.”

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