Page 51 of Play For Keeps

My chest aches remembering that night. I haven’t forgotten a second of it: coming home to the flashing lights of the fire engines, the smell of fire and burning wood, my sister wrapped in a heavy wool blanket in the back of an ambulance. Because I wasn’t there. I wasn’t fucking there. And if I was… my parents would probably still be alive. They went back inside after getting Sierra out and wouldn’t leave until they found me. But I wasn’t fucking inside, and they had no idea.

The soft touch of Everly’s hand on my knee brings me back to the present. I exhale the breath I’ve been holding. Things are about to get heavy. The memory of that night, the nightmares, my parent’s funeral. Part of me wishes I had never brought it up, that we could just go back to talking about my tattoos. But I want to let her in. I scratch my jaw and meet her gaze again.

“My sister and I were devastated. I was a mess for years. We went to live with my grandparents after the fire and man, did I make their life hell.” I shake my head remembering all the nights I came home late, all of the times I screamed and slammed doors. I went off the rails, but my grandparents never gave up on me. They were always there to comfort me when I was eventually able to calm down.

“It was my fault, Ev. I snuck out of the house that night. They couldn’t find me inside… that’s why they never made it out. They were looking for me.”

She shakes her head, like she doesn’t want to hear it. “Jake, don’t you dare. Don’t you blame yourself—”

“Ev.” I stop her before she can go any further, sitting up in bed. I feel a sudden need to get up, to put some space between us so I can collect my thoughts. But she doesn’t let me go. Everly grabs my wrist, tugging gently.

“Please stay.” Her grasp on my arm is weak, but enough for me to know she’s serious. “Please let me be there for you like you were there for me, Jake. I understand why you feel that way, but it just isn’t true.”

Then she’s crawling into my lap, sliding her hands over my jaw to frame my face. And she kisses me. The faintest brush of her lips, the softest sweep of her tongue. And I can breathe again.

My hands grip her waist, holding her in my lap, needing to keep her there. My fingers eventually skim down to her hips, tracing the curve of her ass. I savor the feeling of her warm, soft skin, and I soak her in, my entire body melting into hers. I’m reminded of what it feels like to fall in love with someone and I want to chase that feeling again.

She breaks the kiss after a beat, tilting her chin to my bicep, brushing the back of her knuckles over my staircase ink. “And the tattoo. It’s to remind you to take one step at a time?”

I nod because saying anything right now feels impossible.

She sighs, then nestles into me, and I pull her into my chest. I feel her breath ghost over my collarbone, then her lips follow.

“I’m sorry, Jake. I’m so sorry you had to go through that.”

I still miss my parents so much it physically hurts sometimes. My dad coached my baseball team when I was younger, he was the dad-joke guy, and all of my teammates loved him. He lived and breathed for my mom, my sister and me. I wanted to be just like him. I still do. My mom taught my sister how to bake, she’d watch movies with me in forts we’d make out of every blanket and pillow we could find in the house. There’s no question there was a lot of love in the house I grew up in. My parents were the hopelessly-in-love type, always sneaking kisses or holding hands. They always looked at each other like they were the only ones in the room. It kills me that their lives were taken away from them. I fucking hate that reality.

It’s not fair.

I’m not sure how many people find a love like theirs. Sometimes I wonder if that will ever be in the cards for me.

I’m knocked back to the present when Everly’s phone chimes on the nightstand. She doesn’t move, she stays right where she is, with her legs straddling my hips, her head on my chest.

Not even five minutes later, her phone chimes again, and she sighs. “It’s probably my mom. I should make sure everything is okay with Birdie.” Everly climbs off me, picks up my T-shirt from the floor where I left it last night and slips it over her head. Then she picks up her phone, checks the screen and drops it back on the nightstand.

“Everything okay?” I ask, puling the bedsheet up past my waist.

She stands up, wrapping her messy hair into a ponytail with an elastic she finds on her bedside table. My dick stirs. Why is it so hot watching her tie up her hair? “Everything is fine. It wasn’t my mom.”

She tenses when her phone chimes for the third time. This time she silences the ringer and places the iPhone face down on the table.

“Everly, who is that?” I ask cautiously. “Is it him?”

She looks mortified. A little angry, too. “Yes, it’s Grant.” She sighs, sitting back on the bed. “I’ll call him later. Unfortunately, I cannot avoid my ex-husband forever.”

My blood begins to boil. “Does he always blow up your phone like that?”

She drops her head in her hand and nods. “Grant grew up getting everything he wants. He’s still the same, nothing has changed. Especially when it comes to me.”

I hate that she has to deal with this guy. He clearly enjoys getting under her skin. I grab her by her hips and pull her in between my legs, her back to my chest. “He’s a dick,” I say, lacing our fingers together. “And for what it’s worth, I think you are amazing. You are an incredible mom to Birdie; you work your ass off to give her what she needs.” I pause to kiss the top of her head. “But he shouldn’t be allowed to treat you the way he does. You don’t deserve that.”

I feel her lungs expand in her chest. “I wish it were that easy. I’m stuck with the guy for the next 10 years.”

“I know he’s Birdie’s dad, so I’m not going to be an asshole about it, but if you ever need me to put the guy in his place, I’d be happy to. In fact, nothing would make me happier.” I would love to put my fist to his face.

A small laugh escapes her, then she lets out a long sigh. “I’ll remember that. You’re a caveman, Jake.” She wiggles her back against my chest.

“Oh, believe me. I’m a caveman. I am very protective of what is mine. Your ex does not want to make me mad.”

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