Page 81 of Trust

“If that were true, you wouldn’t be cantankerous one minute and stay away the next.”

“I think you’re reading the map wrong, Liv.” He shook his head. “The truth is…the closer we get, the more I have to lose. I have never been this vulnerable in my life. And less capable of handling the unknown.” He tightened his grip. “My uncertainty and fear are triggering a lot of bad behavior.” Letting out a disgusted huff, he shook his head. “I’m sorry, Liv. You deserve a hell of a lot better than me.”

“Thank you for the apology.” She rested her head against his shoulder, feeling utterly defeated. If he didn’t feel worthy, there was nothing she could do. “I admire how calm you are.” She straightened and shifted away. “I’m a mess inside, and you’re in total control. Must have something to do with your combat experience.”

“Babe, going into battle is a lot easier than opening myself to what I’m fairly sure is utter destruction,” his fingers gripped the bench, “of what’s left of me.”

“So, is it time to walk away from our short entanglement before we do too much damage to each other?”

“I don’t want to, even though it’s tactically the best option.” Zane gusted out a big breath. “I gotta protect you, Liv. You deserve the best a man has to offer.”

“Don’t you dare drop your fear of failure in my lap.” She moved to the edge of the bench. “Just admit that being single is your jam. Telling me I need protection is a smokescreen that I won’t let you hide behind.” She squinted her eyes, making the colors in the sky melt together. “You got to me, Zane, in a way no one ever has.”

“Same, Liv.”

“Another life-changing declaration said with so little emotion.” She let out a mirthless laugh. “It’s like you’re telling me about a plumbing issue or the expected weather for next week.”

Zane dropped his head. “If I don’t keep an iron fist on my emotions, I’ll blow something up or start howling at the moon.”

Folding her hands carefully, Olivia swallowed all the feelings that being in Zane’s company produced. There was no happy ending to their tale, and it was time to accept it. Trying to love a man who was tied in more knots than a macramé plant holder was madness. And that wasn’t anything she needed to take on.

She wasn’t a fool for love, after all.

Especially with a man who had zero interest in exploring his vulnerability. Not that she was particularly enthusiastic about the prospect. But that certainly wasn’t the point. Sighing, she closed her eyes and told all her soft emotions to take cover.

“I knew early on that the care and feeding of a woman like you was beyond me.”

“What the hell does that mean?”

Zane lifted his head slowly. “You’re not a good-time girl. You are the real deal and deserve a man who can commit.”

“And who says that you don’t have that to give?” She pushed herself to her feet. “Maybe the lie that you’re not capable is one you invest in so that you don’t have to risk losing again.”

“That’s rich, Liv. Especially coming from you.”

“What the hell does that mean?”

“You ready for that kind of truth to be laid down?”

She leaned down, so their faces were close. “I have dealt with the hard cold truth for so long that I can’t remember a time when I didn’t.”

He groaned. “I can tell by the look on your face that you don’t truly believe that.”

Fury filled her body, and she let it unfurl, knowing that any emotion was better than the pain radiating from her heart. She embraced the rush of adrenaline and was ready for a good brawl. Shouting and raising her fist to the injustice was much more appealing than examining the untruths she comforted herself with.

She fisted her hands and firmed her resolve, knowing she could handle anything the man had to share. “I’m listening, Zane.”

Was he poking the bear? Absolutely.

Did he regret it?

Not even a little.

Olivia was hiding behind some well-constructed lies, and he was damn tired of it. “I’m not the only one with demons, Liv. You’ve got a whole bunch of your own. Thad’s ghost is alive and well, and you’re keeping him nice and close, so you never have to risk your heart again.”

“How dare you!” she replied with a low, tight tone.

He stood, towering over her. “Oh, that’s right, your emotional acuity can’t be questioned. Happy, positive Liv doesn’t have any hidden monsters that gnaw on her bones, making her question if truly opening herself up to another is a good idea.” He slapped his heart. “It’s just the scarred vet that has shit to work out.”

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