Page 23 of Lost In London

“Like all band-aids, they eventually fall off. They stop sticking. They lose their elastic grip. She’s going to stop being enough for you and what will happen then, London? What will happen when the things that go boo in the middle of the night start getting louder and coming out in the daylight? Beloved, you have to heal yourself first because running from what you truly desire will only leave you more wounded as well as her.” I hated that I had to call London out on her shit before our first date, but it was needed.

She gave her past, all her trauma inflictors a welcoming seat into every relationship without even knowing it. What she thinks is protecting herself is feeding the darkness her light. The more she continues to live in a lie her light will never shine because she’s giving it away to what doesn’t serve her.

I can care less about who anybody dates. That’s their prerogative and choice, not mine. I’m sure if I did a poll to see if the people who sat next to us could rate their relationship, they’d give them nothing higher than a three and that was pushing it. When you’re in a relationship with someone that you like it’s reflected in the way you look at them, touch them, and converse with them. London treated Olena like she was a regular casual friend and not her girlfriend.

A man hurt London, that’s more than evident.

He probably violated her in unimaginable ways, but she was doing herself more harm by being with someone thinking they were safe rather than being with someone because they gave her safety. A complete difference from what she thought she was doing.

Wiping her face clean, she pushed down her shades and that hard exterior came back in full force. “While your theory may be true or false, one thing I can agree with you on is that Olena is my present and those voices never stopped screaming. Have a good day, Mr. Reid.”

“I’m outside,” Elgin spoke and hung up before I could utter a word.

Any other day he probably would’ve gotten his feelings hurt but I wanted some company and him calling me an hour ago to take me out for some fun perked me up. I thought we were coming to Florida to have a mini vacation while also hiding out from the bullshit until Dre and Atlas sorted out their issues. The beach was calling my name and I’d yet gotten a chance to wiggle my toes in the sand.

Cassian called himself being funny by setting up a kiddie pool and dumping a bunch of white sand he got from Home Depot outside my house. The effort was cute and all but I wanted the real beach. I wanted to put on one of the million and one thong bathing suits I’ve been ordering and have some Miami fun. There was no way I was wearing my little skimpy bathing suits around all of these married Kalmin men. JD would be the only one to appreciate my attire.

“I’d like to purchase these please.” Walking up to the counter in Bath and Body Works, I placed my large cart of candles on the counter and handed the cashier my credit card. Candles were a weakness of mine. I was such a fragrance whore.

Don’t go. He’s dangerous. He’s not the one. Don’t go.

Startled by the deep baritone, I looked around me and back at the cashier. “I’m sorry, did you say something?

“No, ma’am.”

Lies.com.

I know I’ve been smoking more than I ever have with Cassian but Atlas swore his herbs wouldn’t fry my brain cells. That voice had become louder by the second. The more I ignored it, the louder it got.

“Here you go. I placed your receipt in the bag. Thank you for shopping with us today.” Taking my bag, I smiled and thanked her.

For the last two hours, I’ve been walking around The Galleria Mall trying to find something to buy but nothing spoke to me except candles. I didn’t have anything in particular that I wanted to buy, just wanted to get out of the house and off that jail of a compound. See new faces and hear new voices.

I thought about having Elgin meet me at the compound but after a second thought, I changed my mind and decided to have him pick me up from the mall. One, Amell would probably skin me alive and then feed me to his piranha if I invited a stranger to his Fort Knox compound. Two, I wasn’t sure how I felt about Elgin yet to give him my address. Yeah, he checked off almost every box on my perfect guy list but there was something about him that made me pause.

I paused a lot when it came to him actually. Never told him who I was associated with. Never mentioned my brother and who he was. To him, I was just a girl from New York named London. That’s it.

“Is he serious?” After tossing my bags in my car, I walked around to Blue Martini where I told him to meet me at. I told him we could have drinks here but he wanted to take me to some tiki bar on the beach.

One thing about the men in Florida I never understood and wasn’t trying to was their love for ridiculously high rims and loudspeakers. I hated it. It was so tacky. Cassian and Pacino had these box Chevy’s or whatever they called them. Now, the custom paint job was drool worthy and so were the gold rims, but then you had Elgin who had these thirty-six or forty-inch rims on this old ass F150. When I asked how much he spent on tricking out the car, I could’ve slapped him.

Damn near sixty grand for an old ass car to sit on high rims, blast music that sounded like it was rattling, and a paint job that looked cheap. Compared to Cassian’s cars it was an imitation.

The closer I walked to his truck I could feel the base vibrating, muffles of music rattled. He must’ve had the worst speakers in South Florida. “Guess I’ll open my own door.” Through the dark tint of his truck, I could see him sitting there scrolling on his phone. Once he saw me, all he did was a quick glance and go back to his phone.

Typical.

I knew the chivalry act he’s been giving me since we met was nothing but an act. Soon as I opened the door the lyrics of Trick Daddy almost burst my eardrums. “Hey!” I yelled over the music. He didn’t even acknowledge me. Minutes passed and not a single word. This was when I was supposed to hop out and go home but I wanted some manly attention. I looked over at Elgin and cringed. He looked… off.

“How are you doing?” He finally spoke, turning down the music.

“Good and you?”

“Okay.” He turned the music back up.

For the entire ride, we sat like this; music blaring and me praying for this night to be over with.

Since the Galleria Mall was less than ten minutes from Fort Lauderdale Beach, it took us no time at all to get to the Best Western Plus Oceanside Inn. He pulled his truck into the parking lot of the hotel and my heart began to race. Nothing about this said tiki bar and drinks.

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