Page 74 of A Lick of Flame

27

Maya

Orion tosses another log onto the fire, causing a burst of sparks and embers to shoot into the night sky. The flames greedily lap at the fresh wood, growing higher. A satisfying crackle echoes through the clearing, punctuating into the peaceful night air.

I lick my fingers as well as my lips. “The rabbit was delicious,” I tell Orion. “Thank you.” I move my gaze back to the fire.

I can barely look at him. I thought that things between us would be better with everything out in the open, but they are worse. Orion can tell me all he likes about how natural it is to be curious, and how normal it is to be interested in sex. It’s a great pity that it doesn’t feel natural to me.

I’m not sure which is worse – that Orion knew I was watching and…touched himself anyway or me and my peeping Tom ways. I shut my eyes. It’s me. I’m worse. I should never have watched him in the first place.

Orion probably did what he did to teach me a lesson and scare me away, but he didn’t bargain on me staying and watching the whole thing.

“You can stop beating yourself up now, Maya,” he says. “I can practically hear you thinking. Stop giving yourself such a hard time. So, what if you watched me?” He shrugs. “Let’s move on. We’re supposed to be resting up so that we can take on the witch. You’re too busy stressing to rest.”

“Can you drop it already? I wasn’t even thinking about that.”

He laughs softly. “If you say so.”

“I do.”

“Okay,” he says.

“Okay, what?”

“Okay, nothing. Just okay. That’s all.”

“That’s not all! I can hear it in your voice.” I should take my own advice and drop it, but I can’t seem to make myself do it.

“I think you’re lying about all of it, but it doesn’t really matter what I think.”

“Lying how?” I want to punch myself in the jaw to shut myself up. Why do I keep asking him stupid questions? Whhhhyyyy?

“You’re lying about why you watched. It may have started out as just curiosity, but it didn’t stay that way. Heat, desire, lust. I think you felt all those things. I think you’re still feeling them. I think you wanted me to put my hands on you in the same way I was touching myself. I think that you still do.”

“I don’t!” I shake my head. There is a tremor in my voice. “What would be the point? Women are not made the same way as men. They don’t…they can’t…we… It isn’t like that for us,” I say the first thing that comes to mind, but only because he is right, and I don’t want him to know it.

He gets a look of concern. His eyes even cloud. “Who told you that?”

“No one. I…um…I… It doesn’t matter. I just know it,” I stammer, feeling like a fool. I don’t know anything of the sort. I don’t know anything at all when it comes to this subject.

“I’m not going to say too much on the matter, save that you are wrong and goddess-willing, you will meet the right man one day, and he will show that to you.” His jaw tightens for a moment. He even looks angry.

Orion throws another log into the fire, and more sparks fly around us.

“You said that our conversation was inappropriate, but not for the reasons I may think. What did you mean by that?” Again, I know I shouldn’t ask this question, but I want to know. I have to know.

Orion smiles at me. “Oh, Maya! You know that saying, ‘Curiosity killed the cat’?”

“Words don’t kill.”

“You’re sure you want to know?” He narrows his eyes, looking at me intently. Like he can see right into the heart of me.

I nod once. “Yes.” It’s more of a whisper.

“You don’t seem too sure.”

“Well, I am.”