Page 114 of Queen of Diamonds

“It was the right call.” His voice was rough. “You need to check on Zed. I have her.”

Knowing there was no force on this earth that would pull Knight from Glade, I dared leave to find Zed outside the front doors, crouched on the steps that led up to the grand mansion, fingers digging into his scalp.

I sat down beside him.

A long, long time passed,

I didn’t say anything.

I’d always been shit at comfort and feelings. But sometimes, when Knight was upset, I felt him calm in the bond when I sat near him, even if I didn’t say anything. The bond was really useful for things like that.

Zed wiped his eyes with his sleeve and glanced at me.

I made sure to meet his eyes, and sure enough, the bitter edge to snow santal smoothed out a bit.

Good.

I was doing it right.

“Is she…?” He trailed off.

“Heat. I gave her drugs. Knight’s taking care of her.”

“I fucked up.”

“You didn’t know.” She took touch-starved to another level. She needed one of us there at all times—I was anxious leaving her now, even knowing Knight wasn’t going to let her go. But Zed was important, too.

There wasn’t a piece of this family that we could neglect, and for the first time in my life, it was just me and Knight holding up the ship.

“I don’t know how to do this,” Zed said at last.

Hmmm.

Okay, I was in a little more trouble if he wanted to actually talk.

Still, he looked distracted, running fingers through his hair as he stared off into the beautiful gardens.

“You… never wavered,” he said. “When I couldn’t stop hating her, you never found a way to stop loving her.”

No.

But we were just… different. When she rejected Zed and Knight—after they’d fallen in love with her so hard that she’d stolen the colour from every other inch of the world… Well, I think they had to hate her so they wouldn’t hurt so much.

But for me, that would have been impossible.

She was my oasis. Rain clouds in unending drought. Not loving her just wasn’t in my DNA. It was figuring out how to live without her… That had been the hard part.

“The night at the High Roller…” He asked. “You were the one who found her.”

I cocked my head, considering where he was going with that.

“How much did you know?” he asked.

“I knew she was in trouble.”

“You were watching her?”

“From the moment she left Ace. I just didn’t know…” I frowned. I’d made a mistake. “I never wanted to take away the choice you gave her.”

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