Page 93 of To Crave Truly

“Lori! Fenris!” Jasper yelled as he fell to the ground next to us.

The others joined us, standing close and forming a circle to protect us.

Fenris was dying.

I closed my eyes, searching for the ribbon of his soul. It was there, but faint. The colour almost faded. I could fix this. I could pull on it and strengthen it. Infuse the life spark. I’d done it with Iveri, I could do it now. I tried to reach for it, but it pulsed and stung me, refusing to cooperate.

Fenris groaned. “Stop… Lori. You can’t fix this one.”

I opened my eyes and found his brown ones staring up at me. My own eyes stung with the tears I desperately wanted to shed, but I needed to think. To focus. There had to be something we could do.

But I knew there wasn’t. He was fading and there was nothing anyone could do. I couldn’t save him. I had the power of life but because I’d already used it on him, I couldn’t save him again. Which was stupid.

I held him tighter, stupidly hoping that would keep him with me. “Please, don’t die.”

He coughed a wet, raspy chuckle. “Not sure I can do that.” He held his hand up. “My ring. Take it.”

“No, I—”

“Lori, please.”

He locked gazes with me, and I hated how this felt like a sense of finality. An ending. I didn’t want it. I just wanted Fenris.

I pulled the ring from his finger, a sob escaping. I tried to keep it in, to be strong, but the pain was too much.

“I choose you, Lori,” he said, his voice faint.

I slipped the ring onto the ring finger of my left hand and let it resize itself to fit my much smaller digit. Then the dam I’d been hiding all my emotion behind burst and tears fell freely down my face.

“Please, don’t go,” I sobbed. “I love you.”

He smiled weakly. “I love you, too.”

Then he was gone.

Chapter Forty-Two

Lori

Fenris’ elemental energy had cleared a circle around us, destroying the demons and other creatures that were nearest to us. Many had fled after that, including Camael and his Guardians.

“His energy acted like a supernova,” Edwin said. “It’s destroyed the machine and taken out a number of the attackers.”

But I didn’t care. Fenris was gone. His body was going cold in my arms.

He was dead.

Saskia sobbed softly behind me, but I couldn’t break now. Not when I had a vampire to utterly fucking destroy. I kissed the tips of my fingers and placed them on Fenris’ forehead. I lay his body on the ground and stood up, the others rising with me.

I looked at the others and sensed the same burning rage as mine staring back at me through their eyes.

I felt a fury like I’d never felt before. It grew and morphed into something visceral, until all I could feel was rage. It consumed me. Became me. And I let it fuel my power until it was something twisted and dark. Until it blinded me to anything else but my single focus.

“No one touches Mordecai. He’s mine.”

They all nodded and stepped to the side.

I didn’t care that this was going to take everything from me, that it would take my grace and change me to my core. That it would mark my soul. I was numb and it was too late anyway. Mordecai ran towards me, and I moved without thinking, not really seeing what I was doing. My conscience took a back seat, and I was just anger and rage as I charged at Mordecai.

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