Page 56 of Sure, Pal

26

Sienna

My heart pounded as I pulled up to Evan’s parents’ house just before sunset. I was so damn confused after what had happened at the funeral. I had no idea what Evan and I were, but I wanted to be there for him.

My breath caught in my chest when I remembered the way it felt when Evan slid into me in the rain. We weren’t just fucking. It was like he was pouring his grief into me, and I wanted his pain. I would hold it all for him to see him smile.

I climbed out of my car and headed up to the front door. Tears burned the corners of my eyes as I pictured Evan and his dad hunched over the old Camaro engine like they were almost every time Ava and I came to hang out.

When I reached the door, I noticed that an Independence Day wreath still hung there, even though it was almost Halloween. July was when life froze for the Cox family. I took a deep breath and knocked.

Evan pulled open the door with red-rimmed eyes. He didn’t speak but stepped back to let me in. The house was dark and quiet. The air felt both heavy and fragile, and I didn’t know if I should talk, hug him, or just stand there in the entryway.

Evan watched me with his clear blue eyes full of so much pain. I needed to hold him. I couldn’t stop myself. I stepped forward and gently wrapped my arms around his neck. “Hey,” I whispered.

“Hey,” he whispered back and wrapped his arms around my waist.

I pulled away from our embrace before it could turn into anything more. “Where’s your family?” I asked.

Evan sighed and ran his hands through his hair. “My mom is upstairs. She doesn’t leave Charlie’s bed very often. Charlie just took off. I think she’s cracking. Bea’s with her daughter.” Evan stared down at the carpet. “Let’s go out back.”

I nodded and followed him through the dark house. The kitchen island was littered with stacks of unopened mail and rolls of bandages, ice packs, packaged syringes — evidence of the sickness that took Evan’s father. My heart ached for him. Empty take out boxes covered the table. A fresh, unopened pizza box sat in the center.

Evan pulled open the sliding glass door and stepped out onto the porch. The backyard was an overgrown mess. Evan sank onto the steps and said, “I let this yard get so bad. I should have been on top of things. I should have been more helpful. I’m going to clean it up tomorrow.”

I could have said, “Don’t be so hard on yourself! Your whole family was going through hell!” But instead, I nodded and said, “I’ll come and help you. What time are you starting?”

Evan turned to gaze at me with something indiscernible in his eyes. “I’ll probably start around ten.”

“Okay. I’ll be here.”

We sat in silence for a moment, watching dusk fall and listening to the crickets chirp. The silence wasn’t uncomfortable. It was fitting. Finally, Evan let out a deep breath. “I need to make sure my mom eats. I’ll be right back.” He stood and walked back into the house.

I sat on the porch alone for a moment before heading back inside, too. Evan was already upstairs with his mom. My eyes traveled over the messy kitchen, and I so badly wanted to help. I dug around until I found empty trash bags under the sink, and then I got to work cleaning up all of the take out boxes. Then I threw away all the money mailers, ads, and other junk mail and stacked anything that looked mildly important into a neat pile.

I turned to the sink next and started washing the pile of dirty dishes. I didn’t hear Evan come back downstairs, but it didn’t startle me when he wrapped his arms around me from behind and kissed the top of my head. It felt so perfectly natural, and after he released me, he seamlessly moved to my side and started drying the dishes I’d washed.

We didn’t talk about “us.” We actually didn’t talk at all. We moved quietly through the house, cleaning up little messes together.

Charlie burst through the front door as I vacuumed the living room. Her light brown hair was disheveled, and her eyes red and swollen. She shocked me and threw her arms around my neck.

I turned off the vacuum and hugged her back. “Hey, Charlie.” I smiled. “It’s been a while.”

Charlie didn’t speak. She released me and walked into the kitchen. I glanced over at Evan, who was dusting the blinds, and raised my eyebrows in a question. He shrugged.

A minute later, Charlie was back with a bag of potato chips. She sank onto the couch and turned on the TV. “Have a seat, kids,” she said to Evan and me. “We’re watching the Harvest Festival episode and eating chips while you two pretend you’re not in love. It’ll be just like old times.”

“Charlie…” Evan sighed.

“Sit down!” Charlie snapped and turned on Parks and Rec.

Evan and I obeyed.

“See?” Charlie said. “Just like old times.”

After the second episode, our smiles were almost real. After the third, Evan laced his fingers through mine.

Charlie leaned over and looked at our hands clasped together. Then she let out a huge exaggerated sigh. “Thank God!” She gave Evan a pointed look and said, “I knew she’d forgive you.”

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