Page 95 of My Brother's Teammates

Now he’s got his hand on my shoulder once again as we watch Charlotte leave the apartment, tugging that fucking suitcase behind her.

I don’t know what to say, what to do… How do I fix this? How do I make this right? I couldn’t make it right when my dad died. I don’t think I can now either.

I’ve never felt so helpless.

A tear runs down my cheek, followed by another, and I turn away. I’m the easygoing one, the one who never lets anything get him down.

I don’t want him to see me cry.

“You need me to pretend I don’t see that?” He knows. Of course, he knows.

I huff a laugh, swiping my face, but when I turn to face him, it only makes things worse. Of course his eyes are watering too, and watching the tears trickle down his face is like getting stabbed in the gut.

He knows Charlotte isn’t coming back.

It makes all of this so fucking real, and I’d give anything for a few more seconds of happiness. A few more seconds of Charlotte, standing in front of us, modeling her lingerie.

Finally, it felt like we were all fitting together, like we could all work at a team. But now? What do we do?

I need space. Please let me take it.

She couldn’t get out of here fast enough. She didn’t need space, she needed an escape.

“I’ve got you.”

The words come out in unison as we put our arms around each other. I bury my face in the crook of his neck and inhale. His spiced vanilla scent grounds me, its familiarity giving me a false sense that things are normal, when it’s everything but.

He’s comforting me now, but what happens when Charlotte isn’t here and he realizes I’m not enough? That without her between us, we’re nothing?

A few more tears slip free, and I tighten my arms around Roman as the floor opens up below me and it feels like I’m falling. My stomach clenches and my insides are lined with lead. A heavy weight presses down on my back, and I’m not sure I know how to breathe.

“Went and fell for her, huh?”

There’s no judgment, no smugness or ‘I told you so’ vibe from his statement. And it’s a statement, not a question. In such a short time, Charlie managed to realign my whole world. She made me—us—feel complete. He knows, because of course he does. He knows me better than I know myself sometimes.

Jesus.

I don’t know how I didn’t see him coming.

Until Charlie, Roman had never been anything more than my best friend. I didn’t think he had any interest in men, and hell, I guess he didn’t know either. She was the one who opened our eyes to each other, the glue that bonded us together. And now…

His shoulders shake against me, grief rolling off him in waves. His shoulders sag and he clings to me, just as tightly as I’m holding him.

I know exactly how he feels.

There’s a hole in my heart, a space Charlotte took up, and with every passing second, it only gets bigger. And Roman? He’s here for now, but with Charlie gone, our entire future together is completely up in the air. Staying with me means eventually outing us to our friends, our family, the entire fucking world. I’ve never wanted long-term, never wanted anything serious, and the two of them have turned me upside-down in mere weeks.

What will I do without them?

“Breathe.” His arms tighten around me, and we take shaky breath after shaky breath. “You love her, right?”

I snort, pulling back a little to look into his glassy brown eyes. “Of course I do. We’ve only lived with her for a couple weeks, but we’ve known her for years. It just… it just feels right. Do you?”

He wipes his tear-stained cheeks with the back of his sleeve. “Yep. Guess that makes us both emotional saps.” He pauses, takes another breath, and leans his forehead against mine. “Are you afraid I’m going to leave too?”

My heart races, and I let the words hang heavy between us for a few beats. “Maybe.”

“Mateo.” The way he says my name is pained, like it’s a struggle to get out.

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