Page 79 of Full Throttle

Lee came to me then. “Don’t what?” he challenged, his eyes flashing. “Don’t call you out? Don’t act like you and him haven’t been avoiding either for the last few months? Don’t act like you don’t care for him and he doesn’t care for you? Don’t what, Dominique?”

“I told you to call me Nikki,” I whispered, my heart pounding inside my chest.

“I saw your fucking face today after Stevens dropped that fucking bomb on us. I felt the fucking fear rolling off you,” he pushed, taking a step towards me.

I took a step back and found myself in the corner of the room. Lee kept going. “I watched you fucking flee back to Sullie’s so you could hide in your own little world. Then, I just showed up here and Shayla told me you're in the office with my woman, acting as if nothing happened.”

I said nothing, staring at him in disbelief.

“You’ve been walking on eggshells for months, Nikki. You don’t sleep. You barely fucking eat. Then, my car blows up—with you inside,” he pushed, his voice shaking with anger. “You act like everything is okay, that you’re fine, but I know you aren’t. I know Cain is a big part of that.”

“Stop,” I begged.

He shook his head. “No. Dontell and Mina—hell, even Amara—can stand by and pretend that your history with Cain doesn’t affect you, but not me. You got that?” He leaned down into my space. “You should’ve seen him, Nikki. He was a fucking wreck at the hospital. He didn’t eat. He didn’t fucking sleep. I’d never seen a man so scared—and Cain fucking Donovan isn’t scared of much.”

“He didn’t tell me,” I breathed, my breath hitching.

Lee blinked, jerking back an inch. “Didn’t tell you what?”

“That he was Bratva.” Tears took over then, falling down my cheeks one by one as it hit me. “There’s—Lee—there’s a lot of history between us—I—I—” I stammered, struggling to breathe all of a sudden.

What the fuck was wrong with me?

“Fuck,” he bit off and, a second later, I was in his arms, my head against his strong chest.

The flood gates opened then, and a wretched, broken sob left me as the pain from the last decade slammed into me. My knees buckled, but he held me up in his strong arms, his hand going to the back of my head as the tears just kept coming. There was no stopping them now.

The last month and a half meant nothing.

Whenever I saw Cain working on his engines, his back to me, I’d shoved down the urge to speak to him. When his eyes just happened to meet mine by chance, I’d ignored the way my heart skipped a beat. When he walked by me, I’d did everything in my power not to touch him—to apologize to him for leaving the loft without telling him, for scaring him, for being so fucking desperate to get away from him that I hurt him in the process.

“Talk to me,” Lee murmured. “I can’t stand this shit, Nikki. After today, I don’t want any more secrets with the Oasis family. Do you understand? I can’t have anymore.”

“Lee—”

“I gotta know.”

Another sob left me as my tears soaked his shirt. “It hurts,” I pushed out.

Suddenly, I was pushed away, his hands on my upper arms as he growled,” He hurt you?”

“He hurt me in a way all women get hurt, Lee.”

A thick, heavy silence lingered between us for some time before he looked to the screens. “You loved him,” he put together.

“With everything I had.”

“Did he love you?”

My bottom lip trembled against my own will. He never loved me.

Lee’s hold on my arms loosened. “Come here,” he ordered, pulling me to him. This time, I held him back as he kissed the top of my head. “Love complicates things.”

I rolled my eyes. “Why do you think I was trying to avoid it?”

“I understand, more than you could ever know.”

I shook my head against him. “Cain and I will never have what you and Amara have. There’s too much pain—too many secrets.”

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