Page 84 of The Cupcake Standard

Wow. Is it hot in here or just me? What did his text say? I put two and two together, realizing he was teasing me about picturing him naked. Although he hadn’t left much for my imagination, which was okay by me. Damn, Derek. I had to reply, and I didn’t quite know what to say.

He texted first.

You there?

I laughed at myself.

Sorry, was busy drooling over this pic some hot guy sent me. What were you saying?

Lol.

Seriously, Derek, I have to wait till Friday to get my hands on you again? You sure you don’t have some top-secret turbo jet at your beck and call…I’ll even put on the stockings.

His reply was instantaneous.

Fuck. I wish. I’m gonna have a hard time getting to sleep tonight.

For real. I like your fingers better.

I bit my lip, wondering how he’d take that.

Avery, you’re killing me.

I could almost hear his groan as I read his text again.

I miss you, too. XOXO.

And that’s enough mooning over him. I stood to leave when a white rectangle caught my eye, peeking out from a corner of the bed. Maybe it had fallen down when his shirts spilled everywhere? I picked it up, turning it over to find a lined piece of notebook paper.

Derek,

Thank you for climbing down into the canyon to rescue me. You showed me the light of day after the worst heartbreak I’ve ever known. I know I promised I’d stay with you, but some dreams have to be chased. I’ll come back someday. Wait for me?

Yours forever, Princess.

My knees buckled. Luckily, the bed was behind me, and I sank onto it, my fragile world caving in around me. Each flimsy card I’d used to build this delicate house fluttered to the ground. Gina’s confident words, Liam’s comments and every thoughtful thing Derek had ever done…they all added up to nothing in the end. Not when there wasn’t anything to build upon.

It wasn’t anyone’s fault but my own. This had never been more than a glorified game of pretend. I’d known from the beginning to protect my heart because we were both liars. That old chant kept running through my head, “Liar, liar, pants on fire.” Though “pants” doesn’t really fit here. Maybe lips. I thought of all our kisses, and how many times our lips had lied. How I’d gladly take one more lie right this moment just to soothe the ache in my heart.

This was exactly why I didn’t do serious relationships. My parents had been fine one minute, years of perfection under their belt, a real storybook romance, and it had all vanished in a blink. So what’s the point? There was a reason I didn’t surrender, a reason I kept a piece of me locked away. Sex and attraction were one thing, that I could handle. My heart needed to go back into the safe little cave I kept it in for this very reason.

I took a deep breath, looking at the letter once more, wishing I could go back to the lighthearted banter of just a few minutes earlier. But reality had huffed and puffed and blown my house down. A glance at my phone made me realize football would be starting soon, so I needed to pull myself together.

Liam showed up first with the pizza. “Hey.” He did a double-take when he saw me in Derek’s hoodie—now with pants underneath. “Changing it up a little?”

I nodded from my spot in our overstuffed armchair.

He looked me over again, his easy smile fading to a frown. “You okay?”

Maybe I’m not as good a liar as I thought. I started to tell him I was fine, but I didn’t want to lie any more. So I settled for silence.

The slap to his forehead was overly dramatic, even for Liam. “I know something that’ll cheer you up.” He disappeared down the hallway toward Derek’s room. A few minutes later, he returned with a wrapped present in his hands. “Derek wanted me to give this to you before, but I thought you valued your sleep more than me trying to find it. Happy early birthday from him.”

Part of me wanted to throw the box at Liam’s obtuse forehead. I wasn’t one to be cheered up and distracted by shiny gifts, but the other part appreciated him trying. And Derek still wanted to spoil me, even though he was gone. I hesitated when Liam plopped the box on my lap.

“Smile, I have to send a picture to Derek.”

I did. I opened the box to find a super soft Detroit Lions blanket just right for snuggling. Liam snapped pictures as I lifted it out of the box. Then I buried my face in it.

---