Page 42 of Disciplined: His Forbidden Crush

Summer’s ran a palm over the smooth skin of his thigh as he imagined Rafael’s rough hands on him. Oh, what a pleasure it was to be touched by Rafael. How special Summer felt. But also, how dangerous it was to play with this fire.

When Rafael emerged from the bedroom, the change in atmosphere was palpable. Rafael’s eyes appeared clouded with worry, and his jaw clenched tightly as if trying to hold back some strong emotion. The usual confidence that radiated from his powerful frame seemed diminished, replaced by an air of unease.

“Rafael, what’s wrong?” Summer asked cautiously, unable to keep the concern from his voice. He couldn’t help but notice the way Rafael’s hands curled into fists at his side, knuckles turning white with tension. “Who was on the phone?”

“Your father,” Rafael replied tersely, avoiding Summer’s gaze.

Summer bristled at the mention of his father, a mixture of anger and resentment bubbling up in him. His father had always been a demanding presence in his life, loving him fiercely yet pushing him to become someone he wasn’t. His father envisioned Summer taking on a prominent role in the cartel, carrying out his ruthless orders without question or hesitation, like his older brother. But Summer knew deep down he could never become that person. He couldn’t stomach the violence of their world.

And he knew his father could never condone his secret feelings…his desire for men. If Garcia ever discovered the truth, especially about the passionate, heated nights spent entwined with Rafael, Summer knew his father’s wrath would be unfathomable.

Rafael’s posture was rigid, his shoulders tense as he leaned against the wall. His arms were crossed defensively over his chest, effectively putting up an invisible barrier between them. The softness in his eyes had been replaced by a steely resolve, and Summer could feel his irritation morph into anxiety.

“Hey,” Summer said softly, taking a cautious step toward Rafael.

But instead of welcoming him with open arms as he’d done before, Rafael only straightened further, his jaw tight and his gaze fixed on some distant point beyond. The distance that had settled between them was palpable, and it made Summer’s nerves tighten.

“Rafael,” Summer tried again, reaching out a hand to touch Rafael’s arm. But as soon as his fingers brushed against the warm skin, Rafael flinched and stepped back, avoiding Summer’s touch.

Summer’s heart clenched painfully, and a cold dread began to seep into his bones.

“Must’ve been a good report you gave my father, huh?” Summer joked weakly, trying to lighten the mood. “I mean, I’ve been on my best behavior lately.”

Rafael snorted, his dark eyes finally meeting Summer’s for a brief, bitter moment. “Yeah,” he said with bitter amusement, “I couldn’t exactly tell Garcia why you’ve been so obedient, could I? I can’t just confess that I’ve been fucking you into submission.”

Summer recoiled, anger surging through him at Rafael’s words. He hated the idea that Rafael thought he had been tamed like some wild animal, forced into compliance through sex. And yet, as much as it stung, Summer couldn’t deny that there was some truth to it. He had been better behaved since Rafael started screwing him, but was that really all there was to it?

“Tell me what he said,” Summer demanded, his voice tight with frustration. “I deserve to know.”

Rafael clenched his jaw, staring at Summer for a long, agonizing moment before finally relenting. “You know what he said. He wants you home. Obedient, too. A good little boy for him.” Rafael tossed his head, like he was trying to throw off a leash. “When we’re back in Colombia, we have to stop this...whatever this is between us.”

Summer’s heart sank, a painful heaviness settling in his chest. He listened, heart aching, as Rafael went on.

“We can’t keep doing this behind your father’s back. The cartel is too fucking dangerous for us to be messing around like this, for us to be...together.”

The words stung, and Summer couldn’t deny the truth in them. Even as his heart ached, he knew that any forbidden trysts would only lead to disaster in a world as brutal as the one they inhabited.

But still, Summer imagined a world where they could continue the thing they’d been making without fear of reprisal. He pictured clandestine meetings in dark rooms, stolen kisses in forgotten corners, nights spent in each other’s arms. The fantasy was intoxicating but terrifying. They would always be one misstep from discovery, and the penalties did not bear thinking about.

So, with a shudder, he pushed the thoughts away, unable to entertain the fantasy any longer.

“Rafael,” he said, his voice shaking with emotion, “I’m not going back to Colombia. I’m staying here.” He looked around the apartment, taking in the space that had become his sanctuary. It wasn’t much, but it was a place where he could finally be himself, something he’d never been able to do in the cartel.

“Your life?” Rafael snapped, anger flaring in his dark eyes. “You think you can just walk away from everything and pretend you don’t have responsibilities?”

“Fuck you, Rafael!” Summer shouted, fury coursing through him. “I shouldn’t have to throw my life away just to appease my father and his goddamn cartel!”

“¡Bastante!” Rafael growled. “You know as well as I do that we don’t have a choice.”

Summer’s heart raced as he watched Rafael’s anger boil over. Rafael’s eyes burned with fury, his muscles tensing under the weight of his emotions.

“You’re going back to Colombia whether you like it or not!” Rafael said, his voice dangerous and commanding. Summer felt a shiver of fear run through him, but deep down, he knew Rafael wouldn’t hurt him.

“¡Come mierda!” Summer spat back. “I don’t belong there anymore. I have a life here!”

“Life? This?” Rafael sneered, gesturing around them. “This is just a fantasy, Summer. A fucking break from the reality of who you are and where you come from!”

The words struck Summer like a physical blow, and he recoiled as if slapped. He tried to steady himself, hands clenching into fists at his sides. The disappointment in Rafael for trying to force him back into the cartel life weighed heavily in his chest. Tears threatened to spill from his eyes, but he blinked them back furiously.

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