Page 47 of The Wolf Moon

“I wasn’t,” I admitted honestly, turning to look at the lake myself with a frown. “The Goddesses and I don’t really get along like that.”

“You’re the first wolf I’ve ever known to be favored by all three Goddesses. I think you’re mistaken,” Roman responded and the annoyance I expected to come hand in hand with such a statement from him didn’t follow. He was acting oddly… respectful.

“Well, I think you’re the only one cursed by all of them, so I guess we make quite a pair, don’t we?” I said with a nervous half laugh.

“Two of them.”

I paused. “What?”

“I was only cursed by two of them,” Roman corrected me. I could guess which two he spoke of, but it still surprised me. I was used to him openly hating all the Goddesses as one being. Even after all this time, it seemed he still didn’t blame every one of them as equally as I thought. “You shouldn’t be out here by yourself. You shouldn’t go anywhere by yourself.”

I finally turned my gaze back to him. Roman was standing only a few steps in front of me now. His scent was drifting in the air with the breeze and catching the attention of that beast within me in response. I tensed, balling my hands into a fist before releasing and repeating again.

“I’m not by myself,” I answered quietly.

“If you give up your title, you would be free to do as you wish without worrying about challenges or attempts on your life,” Roman ignored my comment, but his voice had grown rougher. And so, we were back to this topic. “We could find a volunteer to take your place, stage a challenge to relinquish the title, and leave you with your life in the end.”

“That sounds humiliating. No thanks.” A heat of anger flashed through me, from Roman, but also from me as well. The image of some ‘volunteer’ taking the title and taking him was enough to bother me further. I sighed, running my hand over my arm as if to rub away that heat. My sudden frustration made me brave. “I already told you. I don’t want anyone else by your side.”

“It doesn’t matter who’s by my side. It doesn’t change anything,” Roman said carefully, hiding what thoughts were crossing his mind from appearing on his face. But the heat from his anger had faded almost the moment I told him the truth. His words still stung even without anger.

“Is that true?” I asked him. I knew he meant it wouldn’t change how he ran the pack or maybe even what plans they had for the future, but did it really not matter to him who was his Queen Luna? Was I really just a body he saw unfit? Would anybody do?

Roman tilted his head, his face set in such serious lines of someone deeply dissatisfied.

“Do you want the truth?” He finally inquired, his voice quiet. It made my heart jolt nervously. Did I? I nodded without speaking, my eyes wide on his as I tried to prepare myself for further insults. “I’m worried about you. If the title puts you in danger, I don’t want you to have it. That’s the truth.”

I hesitated. He was worried about me? And before he said he was trying to protect me… For some reason, it made me happy to hear it. Even though we pretty much had been fighting each other since day one, it made me glad to know I was able to do even this much to chip away at that steel heart of his. Why did it make me happy?

With Diana’s pregnancy, I could relinquish the title, couldn’t I? I could use the last of the blessings as reason enough to no longer continue the path the Goddesses placed before me. After all, why keep going? The wolves would probably see no point in harming humanity. Everything could go back to how it was. I could give it up now, knowing Diana’s situation would be revealed far before the Hunter’s moon.

I looked at Roman carefully. He was frighteningly beautiful. I felt out of my element.

“I could ask them for you,” I said slowly before even realizing I was speaking. I felt stupid the moment I said the words and I didn’t elaborate further in hopes that Roman wouldn’t catch it. Of course, he did.

“Ask who what?”

I blanched. I tried to think of a cover up, something that would sound natural, but my mind was blank. Instead, I tensed in preparation of further fury and told the truth of what had crossed my mind.

“I could ask the Triple Goddesses… to… make you mortal,” I finally forced the words from my lips with great difficulty. When I didn’t feel a responding anger and Roman didn’t answer immediately, I felt awkward.

I wouldn’t even know where to begin with trying to ask any Goddesses anything, but I wasn’t lying. The Goddesses seemed focused on stopping Roman, on taking and giving their blessings based on if the wolves were in their good graces, but nothing seemed to indicate they would release Roman in the end even if he were to change his mind. If it was a matter of just praying, Diana was secretly going to teach me the ways in that aspect. I wasn’t sure how well Roman would take me offering to do a criminal act for him despite it being outlawed by him.

Roman’s beast seemed to stretch out within him even before he said anything. It was speaking to that otherworldly creature within me, making my skin heat up wordlessly. Even if Roman acted like I was the biggest headache in the world, his beast never held animosity towards me. I didn’t feel threatened by the odd sensation.

“I’ve asked them for that for centuries. What makes you think they’d listen to you?” His voice was low, a struggle underneath them that I couldn’t understand.

“You said it yourself. They favor me. If they refuse, I could… offer them something in return. A blessing for a blessing, maybe? I could ask them to take away my ability to control animals in return for releasing you from that curse,” I was rambling at this point, embarrassed at how childish I sounded. Like I could just ask the sky for a trade and it would work flawlessly.

“You would give up your blessing for something like that?” Roman was stunned. I hadn’t expected him to be. Before I could answer him, he took a large step closer to me, closing the distance between us abruptly. “Do not even think of doing that. You wouldn’t last a day as you are if you lost that power.” His tone was sharp and demanding once more, but his words were yet another echo of what he’d been forced to say before. He was worried. He wanted to protect me.

“Even if it means giving up mortality?” I asked in disbelief.

Roman was silent a moment, too close for comfort. I felt like I was suffocating, but for some reason I didn’t mind it. My skin felt sensitive, waiting for his touch after him standing so close to me, but he hadn’t lifted his hands to even grab my shoulders as he’d done in frustration before.

“I would never pick myself over my mate,” Roman finally said, his voice uncharacteristically soft. I was caught off guard and in my discomfort, I resorted to a bit of sarcasm to protect myself.

“But you’d pick another woman over me,” I answered quickly, sharply.