Page 67 of The Wolf Moon

“Then tonight will be the final night in which you can correct what we’ve damaged,” Cynthia said to me determinedly. “You are the only one besides us who can kill Roman Stone. You have been able to since your rebirth. If you would have struck him with that arrow, or stabbed him with that blade, he would not have survived.”

I was cold at her words; shocked. I recalled aiming to kill him and hesitating without knowing why. Had it been a phantom feeling or memory? An inherit knowledge that he would die and that it was something I didn’t wish for?

“You want me to kill him?” I asked her with difficulty.

“I am only telling you so you are aware the paths you can take. If you choose, you can kill him and give him the peace he has wanted for centuries. You can fight his packs, but you are mortal, unlike the way we are. You were born as a human and you can die as one. If this happens, you will return to us as Artemis,” Cynthia continued to inform me, careful not to sound too harsh.

“If you fail to stop him at all, no matter if you live or die, we’ll restart the cycle,” Cate added firmly, but then seemed to relax further before sighing. “It’s such a relief to finally get this out here. It’s been amusing watching you stumble around, but it’s been…” A flash of anger crossed her features at a thought or distant memory. “Disrespectful.”

“Now, Hecate, they weren’t aware of who she truly was,” Cynthia scolded Cate lightly.

“Dis-re-spect-ful.” Cate spelled the word out, stubbornly offended.

I shook my head lightly.

“I still can’t wrap my head around it,” I said honestly.

“Well, we don’t have all night, so just take it at face value and learn to accept it later,” Cate teased humorously before linking her fingers together and lifting her hands up to begin stretching. I watched her mess around for a moment before speaking.

“What are you doing?”

“Getting ready to get you to shift, of course,” Cate responded with a groan as she reached for her toes. Cynthia only closed her eyes as though Cate was beginning to annoy her already. They were so… different from one another.

“I can’t,” I mumbled uncertainly, “I’ve tried to shift about a hundred times. I can only do a half shift.”

“That’s because you’re not a wolf,” Cate said lightly, doing a couple of jumping jacks before jogging in place almost comically. “You’re trying to shift like a werewolf and you’re not one. It’s not going to work.”

“I don’t understand,” I repeated my currently favorite phrase.

“The first problem is that you have many many forms, whereas a werewolf only has two. Their focus is only on shifting from one form, a human, to another, a wolf. And then of course reverse. They don’t have to think beyond just allowing the power of transformation wash over them and resulting into whatever they may be,” Cate continued to explain firmly. She lifted a finger to point to herself, “But for us, we don’t have just one option. For example…”

Cate seemed to suddenly twist before me, but her movement was like liquid. Her form distorted and then within a single breath she was airborne; a dark raven which landed on Cynthia’s shoulder proudly. It was official. I had lost my mind. I was obviously in some mad mental state, probably still in the prison cell Roman had left me in. I blinked speechlessly.

“Did you notice the difference in how Hecate transformed versus the wolves?” Cynthia drew my attention to her. I hesitated, looking back to the dark raven before thinking back to the actual transformation. I’d seen several werewolves shift at this point. It seemed like an actual beast exploding from within them, forming over their own skin and twisting them into another creature altogether. I had thought I’d felt the beginnings of that beast, but I remembered how silent it had become among the humans.

As for Cate, when she had changed, it was like breathing. In just another breath, she leapt from Cynthia’s shoulder and as though simply stretching, she was suddenly the same Cate I thought I’d known all along.

“See?” She asked, lifting her arms as though pleased.

I was dumbfounded. I still had doubts about my own ability to shift as easily as she had no matter what the form would be. Before I could answer Cate, Cynthia spoke.

“The second problem you face is that you were reborn. As part of this contract, you won’t gain your memories back until you have faced a mortal death. This makes you weaker than if you had simply taken human form. So learning to use your abilities will take more work and I doubt you’ll ever be able to meet your true potential as Mila, no longer how long you live in this life,” Cynthia spoke with that serious wisdom I was familiar with.

I still couldn’t wrap my head around this second identity. I couldn’t imagine myself beyond… myself. But it was undeniable at this point that they were the actual Moon Goddesses; this was as clear as the raven shape Cate had just turned into. I’d never even heard of another being turning into something beyond a wolf.

I sighed and tried to think about how I’d been attempting to shift previously. “So… this whole time, I’ve been telling the wolf within me to form. I even tried to use my ability to command it to shift within me. This isn’t what I’m supposed to do?”

There is no actual wolf within you. You are already a wolf if you want to be. It’s not a matter of trying to tell it to take over. You just realize you are the form you want to take, that it’s not something you must become because you already have become it. And then you just take a breath and shift,” Cate explained as though her teachings made any sense. I frowned further.

“If there is no beast, what is it I’ve been feeling? And what about being Roman’s mate? How can this be, if I’m not a werewolf?”

Cate shrugged. “That’s Selene’s work, not mine or yours.”

“It’s a mark I placed on your spirit,” Cynthia responded carefully, “When you were made mortal, I attached the connection to your wolf form, so that you could feel something that’s similar to what the werewolves feel. It allowed you to make an attachment to King Alpha’s spirit; something I must confess may transcend with you after you’ve left this mortal form. In this way, he may always be a mark on your soul even after he’s gone.”

I flushed at her words; at how solid and final they were. No matter what outcome, we would have a part of each other marking that unknown entity that made us who we were. It was like an unseen scar. And yet, a part of me didn’t mind such a thought. I drew my attention back to the task at hand.

“So… don’t command. Just be?” I inquired hesitantly.

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