Page 63 of For Fox Sake

A tidal wave of raw tenderness washes over me from head to toe. I missed her these past few days, Ari and Ryan.

She pulls away slightly. “My grandma’s dead.”

“I know.”

She hugs me again, holding my neck tight.

How can I just go and never see them again? I’m not ready to say goodbye. I set her down on her feet.

“Are we going to watch more of our show?” She tugs on my arm, leading me over to the couch and directing me on where to sit so she can crawl between Ryan and me.

“Absolutely.”

I put it on and then try to relax.

Ari leans into my side, tucking her feet up against Ryan’s thigh.

I’m intrinsically aware of Ryan’s presence, only a couple feet away. What is she thinking? What will she say when we get a chance to talk? It can’t be too terrible if she’s allowing me to be here.

On the screen, the characters are in a place called “Kissing Town.” Wolf is wooing Virginia, trying to get her to fall in love with him. It’s incredibly cheesy and silly, but I’ve always enjoyed this part the best. Of course, Wolf has been lying and withholding information from Virginia since they met. He’s been working for the evil queen since episode one.

The parallels to my current situation are not lost on me.

After the episode ends, it’s time for Ari to wash her face and brush her teeth before bed.

I wait in the living room, wiping sweating palms on my jeans and going over and over in my mind what to say to make it better.

By the time Ari’s door snicks shut, I still have nothing.

Ryan’s footsteps sound in the hall, moving into the kitchen. The fridge opens and shuts. When she appears in the doorway to the living room, she’s holding two juice pouches.

“She is exhausted after everything today. I think she might stay in bed this time.” She hands me one of the drinks.

A smile tugs at my mouth. “I see we’re moving up in the world.”

She sits on the other side of the couch, tucking her legs up underneath her. “From boxes to pouches. We’re so posh.”

We lapse into silence. The fridge hums. A car door slams outside in the distance. The quiet stretches and wraps its arms around me, squeezing tighter and tighter until I have to break it.

I take a few pulls on my juice pouch, unsure what to say, where to start. I guess with the truth, no matter how shameful it is. “I went through your trash.”

She blinks. “What?”

I grimace and rub the back of my neck. “For the DNA. When you came over to fix the stove I... it was me that unplugged it. I wanted to meet you.”

The groove between her brows disappears. “The water. You kept offering a water bottle.”

“Yeah.”

“I thought that was weird.”

“I couldn’t think of another way to get something. So, that night after the stove thing, I came over here and...” I tilt my head toward the wall.

“You went dumpster diving?”

“Yes. I’m not proud of it. It was invasive and I was stupid and I should have just told you everything right away instead of being a coward.”

I can’t look at her. I stare down at my hands. I can’t handle the derision that could be in her eyes. How can she ever forgive me, or trust me again?

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