Page 45 of Our Radiant Embers

Our eyes met across the table. It was like a sudden rush of dizziness, punch-drunk, reality blurring around the edges as my focus narrowed to this—Liam and the space between us. Balancing on a razor’s edge. My bed was just a few steps away, and wouldn’t that be…novel? Daylight. And a bed.

His gaze dropped to my mouth.

I didn’t dare move. I didn’t dare blink. Somewhere far off, a car honked.

And then the church bells chimed the half-hour. Even though I was used to it, the sound sent a small shock through my veins.

Liam ducked his head. “So, uh. Two interviews?” Uncertainty wove through his question, and I needed a second to make sense of it.

Right.

Well, this sure felt a lot like Liam shooting me down. Maybe, if I’d had the guts to push for something—but I didn’t.

“Yeah.” I combed a hand through my hair. “They’ll send the detailed questions by Monday. We can discuss them when I come over with Gale.”

“Sounds good.” Liam glanced at me, a small wrinkle between his eyebrows. Sunlight shone on his forehead and the bridge of his nose, sparking in his eyes and hair.

I liked him.

It registered almost absently, no real surprise attached to the thought. Of course I liked him. He was smart and resourceful, a true leader of his family while I just faked it. I also trusted him—which made him one of only three people in my life. I knew it wasn’t the same for him, that his inner circle was bigger than mine and encompassed his parents and siblings, his grandmother, and likely more people. Unlike me, he wasn’t hiding.

Maybe I’d been quiet for too long because Liam cleared his throat. “All right, I should get going.”

I nodded. “Yeah. Busy time, right?”

“Yeah.”

For a beat, neither of us moved. Then Liam smiled and got up. I followed slowly and told myself I wasn’t disappointed. It was for the best. Our two previous hook-ups had been impulsive and fuelled by frustration—take that away and I’d be left floundering, no solid ground under my feet.

It wasn’t worth the risk.

I walked Liam to the door and shut it behind him after we’d agreed on a time for Monday. See you then. Once he’d left, I closed my eyes for a moment, a strange heaviness in my bones. I’d bought this flat two years ago and it had become my sanctuary, a place where I could decompress. It had never felt lonely before.

Toughen up, honey.

* * *

“Liam knows you’re gay?”

“That’s what I just said,” I told Gale. “Minus the dramatic emphasis.”

“But—” He stopped talking and hit the brakes when a lorry in front of us slowed down without warning. I propped one hand against the dashboard to steady myself. Ever since Gale had obtained his driver’s licence, I let him take the wheel since he enjoyed driving. Specifically, he enjoyed driving fast. It was at odds with his quiet personality—a way to feel powerful and in control, perhaps. “But,” he restarted, “how did he find out?”

Yeah, uh.

The first time Liam and I had hooked up, I hadn’t told Gale because the entire thing had been tangled up with Dad pressuring me to start having kids, and Gale knew the pressure was exacerbated by his lack of magic potential. The second time, I hadn’t told Gale because, well, he didn’t know about the first time. But now that Liam knew Gale was aware of my sexuality, with Gale about to spend three days in Liam’s orbit, overseeing the construction of the office? I better tell Gale before Liam did.

“We had a thing.” No, that was overstating it. I corrected myself. “We hooked up a couple of times.”

“Did you?”

“Eyes on the road,” I said primly, and Gale snorted but complied. It was quiet for a second.

“Okay,” he said then. “I don’t need details, right, because no, thanks.”

“Problem with the gay thing?” I interrupted before he could continue.

“No. Problem with the you’re-my-brother thing.”

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