Page 63 of Our Radiant Embers

“Wow, babe.” She raised her head to send me a flat look. “I rarely say this, but you just sounded like your father’s son.”

I fought down the flare of annoyance. “There are some things he’s right about.”

“Maybe. But I’m not sure that this is one of them.” Her eyes narrowed in calculation. “What about a formal alliance between our families? Forget marriage—let’s sign a proper contract, make it official.”

If only.

“Your parents would never agree, your dad in particular. They want children, not an alliance with a family whose power is dwindling.”

“They don’t know that.”

No, the Hartleys didn’t. There were only two people outside my family who knew—Cassandra and Liam. Not a list I would have foreseen three months ago.

“They might suspect something,” I told her. The one time Alaric Hartley had asked me about Gale’s tendency to skip society gatherings, I’d explained it away as shyness. “And anyway, doesn’t change that they want us to have a boatload of powerful kids.”

“Fuck that,” Cassandra said, heartfelt.

Amen. But I still couldn’t see a way out.

* * *

I went back to the Morgans’ the next day.

For a blink of an eye, Liam looked surprised to see me—rain drizzling down and Lila the Drone fluttering around my head like an excited puppy. Jack must have played with her programming again. Then Liam’s face softened, relief bright in his eyes. Maybe he’d wondered if his rejection would prompt some distance between us.

Honestly, I didn’t even know how to stay away from him anymore.

I went back the day after as well, even though progress had been swift lately and Liam could have done without me for a day, or the rest of the week. It was fine; we were fine. Yes, there were isolated incidents here and there when things dipped into awkwardness—like when I turned and almost bumped into him and we both froze for a second. In the end, I was the one who took a hurried step back. I couldn’t meet his eyes for several minutes after that.

Usually, I was so much better at hiding my emotions. Yet I knew this was right there on my face, and a glance was all it would take for Liam to read me. Except he wasn’t quite looking at me either.

We didn’t mention that moment in his bedroom.

But it was fine.

Really.

Fuck—no, it wasn’t. It was so far from fine that my skin felt stretched too thin, like it had shrunk overnight and was meant for someone else. A weird, dizzying lightness sat in my bones each time I caught myself staring at his hands or mouth or eyes, at the hollow of his throat or the swell of his biceps.

If I wanted to keep him as a friend, I’d need to get over it. And I would. I would. I just...God.

I just needed a little time to stop wishing for something more.

* * *

This was my Nero moment.

Two dated office buildings along with an empty mall were going to come down to make room for our new commercial area. It was the Covent Garden site close to my flat, veiled from the public in a manner similar to the site in Southwark that Liam and I had visited last week. Today marked the official beginning of construction—and I was the wrecking ball to kick it off.

In my early twenties, I’d fancied myself a rockstar. Whenever they took me to a construction site for maximum damage, I’d put headphones on and had done the job to the tune of what my dad called angry young men music. Ignite the night and watch me glow. I’m the spark that twists the blaze. We dance, dance, dance in our ashes.

It seemed silly now. But I’d been brimming with sadness and frustration back then, and being someone else, even just for an hour, had felt liberating.

I was more aware these days—deliberately letting my magic off its leash carried risks. My control might be excellent, but potent magic loved the sweet power of destruction, and whenever it got a taste, it wanted more, bigger, better. I couldn’t afford to get distracted.

Yes, a small part of me craved to impress Liam. I would also never outgrow my childlike desire to make my father proud. But right now, I banned it from my mind. Outside the containment barrier that a handful of air mages had erected around the doomed buildings, Liam stood with my father, Eleanor, the site manager, and a few more workers and onlookers. Inside the barrier, I was alone. I closed my eyes for several deep, even breaths. Calm and collected.

When I opened my eyes again, another protective barrier shimmered around me. While I was immune to the effects of my own magic, I wasn’t immune to smoke, falling ashes, and steel.

---