Page 76 of Tiger Queen

I gave a start. “How did you know?”

“I mean, I totally get it. You’re a legit veterinarian. You should be at a big zoo in a major city, and instead you’re here…” His sweeping gesture encompassed the entire zoo complex.

“I didn’t want to say it, but yeah. They’re less than impressed with this place.”

He patted my thigh. “Speaking as a child who is also a disappointment, I feel your pain.”

I snickered. “You’ve got a great job. You’re a computer programmer. And you can work anywhere you want, as long as you have your laptop. Compared to most guys in their twenties, you’ve really got your shit together.”

He shrugged one shoulder. “That’s not what he wants for me, though. I could be the Governor of North Carolina and he would still claim I was wasting my potential.” He blew air out his nose. “I keep speaking about him in the present tense.”

“All three of you have been doing that,” I said gently. “It’s okay that it hasn’t sunk in yet.”

Anthony paused to look through the binoculars. “You know the funniest part of all this?”

“Besides the photos of your dad on every wall in every room of the house?”

He smiled. “David, Jake, and I hated growing up here. We dreamed of leaving. Fantasized about it. But now that we’re back, working in the zoo together? It actually feels good. Being around them, and working with the animals, and everything else. It has made me realize that the thing we hated was dad and his bullshit. Is that a shitty thing to say? That I’m happier with him gone?”

“Not at all,” I said. “I think David and Jake feel the same way.”

I tried to put myself in Anthony’s shoes. It was tough because even imagining Crazy Carl as my dad was impossible. Growing up with him as a parent must have been awful.

It also gave me perspective about my own parents. Their disappointment and confusion about this job came from a good place. They cared about me. They wanted the best for me.

Out of all the problems I had seen lately, that was a good problem to have.

I picked up the binoculars and gazed through them. Brandon was standing outside his trailer. He flicked a lighter and lit a joint in his mouth, then puffed softly.

I handed the binoculars to Anthony so he could see. “If only casual drug use was our biggest problem around here.”

“I know right?”

The walkie-talkie on the console squawked with Jake’s voice. “Rachel? Are you there?” He sounded upset.

“I’m here. What’s up?”

“It’s Caesar. Something’s wrong with him.”

33

Jake

I didn’t worry easily. In my experience, most problems could be solved simply by ignoring them until they went away. Yeah, that was a shitty way to wander through life. But had worked well for as long as I’d been old enough to have problems.

So when Big Caesar started acting weird, I tried not to dwell on it. He slept all morning, and hardly moved in the afternoon. His breathing seemed fine, so maybe he was just chilling in the sun. Big cats did that, and Caesar was older than most.

Then around four in the afternoon he got up and started eating grass. Cats did that too, even the big ones. Helped with digestion or something. Totally normal and not a cause for concern.

But there was something in his eyes that worried me. Like he wasn’t quite right. So after dinner I carried my book out to the zoo and rested up against his fence to hang out with him. Make sure he was alright.

That’s when I heard him dry-heaving. Just like a house cat trying to cough up a hair ball, except Big Caesar went at it for close to twenty minutes. He ate some grass, tried to throw up, then ate some more grass. Finally he laid down against the fence, his back to mine, and started making the most pitiful moaning noises I’d ever heard in my life.

This wasn’t a problem that was going to work itself out by waiting.

I called Rachel on the radio and then went inside Caesar’s enclosure. I scratched his fur and rubbed his stomach, doing all the things that normally helped him calm down. But when my hand touched his belly, he snarled at me.

I jumped back, more afraid than ever—but for Caesar, not of him.

---