Page 48 of Luca

An hour later, I’m wide awake, lying on the couch with nothing but a throw blanket and decorative pillow to rest my head on. I’m sure I could go in search of something more comfortable, but I don’t want to disturb Giada. She’s had a hell of a day, and she’s probably fast asleep by now, seeing as her eyes were half-closed when she walked up the wrought iron staircase to the loft bedroom. It’s not until I hear muffled sobs that I realize I’m not the only one who can’t seem to calm my racing mind.

The sounds coming from the room tug at my chest. There’s no way I can keep myself on this couch while Giada is up there crying, probably completely overwhelmed by everything that’s happened in the last twelve hours. My god, was it just this morning I drove her away from that house in the trunk of my car to escape her brother and the Russians?

I make my way up the stairs and see a lump curled up under the blankets of the California king bed facing away from me.

“Giada,” I say gently as I lie down next to her and turn on my side, facing the crying girl. “Talk to me.”

She turns over, and I can scarcely make out her face in the darkness of the room, but I catch the glistening of tears on her cheeks.

“Being here, with the Monaghans, it’s so different than I expected. I don’t remember my father ever looking at my mother the way I saw Cormac look at Maeve. I’ve never felt the love Cormac so obviously has for his sons and the way he was kind and respectful to Alessia. I’ve never had that, Luca. My house was so cold. I had nannies and housekeepers make sure my needs were met, but no one showed me the love I saw tonight. I guess…I guess I’m just sad that I missed out on that. I thought that’s how all fathers in this life were—cold and distant. It never occurred to me it’s not this life that made him that way, that’s who my father is to the core. The Monaghans are proof of that. It made me realize if he wanted to give a shit about me, there was nothing stopping him. Caring about his family wouldn’t have made him sacrifice his business or his power. He could have had both. But he didn’t. Why couldn’t he have just been a father to me? Why couldn’t he have loved me like he should have?”

Her broken sobs break my fucking heart because I don’t have the answer. Except that Francesco is a heartless bastard, but Giada knows that. She’s just now seeing it didn’t have to be that way because he was head of a Mafia family, and that’s what’s hurting her. If he wanted to, if it was important to him, he could have been the father she deserves, but he never was.

“I don’t know, sweetheart. I wish like hell I did. I wish you could have grown up in a house where you were told how special you are and how incredible you are. That they’re so damn lucky you’re their daughter. Because he is, Giada. He was blessed to have a daughter like you, and he never appreciated it like he should have.”

“You’re lucky, Luca. To have the Monaghans. I saw how much they love each other and how strong their bonds are. I’m so glad you get to have that.”

“They’re your family now too. You have the family you always deserved; it just took a little longer to find them.”

Giada hums but doesn’t say anything further on the subject. That’s okay. Today is a lot to process, and she needs some time to work out her thoughts.

With nothing but silence between us, I move to get up and go back downstairs.

“Don’t,” Giada whispers. “Stay here.”

I pause and slowly lie back down next to her, sinking into the plush mattress.

“Thank you,” she says when she feels me settle. “I just…I don’t want to be alone.”

“Neither do I,” I reply and cover her hand resting between us before closing my eyes, letting exhaustion pull me into a dreamless sleep.

Chapter fourteen

Giada

Iwake to an unfamiliar room with what feels like a furnace pressed to my back and a heavy arm banded around my waist. Luca. He stayed all night. The thought brings a smile to my lips. Yesterday was beyond hard. I think I ran through every emotion possible. From nearly paralyzing fear to anger to relief, then a soul-deep sadness that Luca tried to ease by simply staying with me all night like I asked. There’s still so much to deal with—to process—but having him with me lightens the load just a bit, and I’m so grateful. Finally, I feel like I’m not completely alone, that someone is in my corner and we’re going to figure it out together. Scratch that, several someones. We have the support of the Monaghans now, which is something I never thought I’d say or find comfort in.

When Luca’s phone rings, he stirs behind me and peels himself from my back, grabbing it and answering with a soft hello.

“She’s sleeping. I’ll wake her and let her know.”

He says goodbye to whoever he’s talking to, and I turn to face him. I’ve never seen Luca first thing in the morning before he’s showered and dressed for the day. Well, except for yesterday, but I don’t think that counts, considering the frantic way I barged into his room. But this morning, looking at him with sleep-mussed hair, his eyes still tired after just opening them, a little flutter of…something makes itself known in my chest.

“Sorry, did I wake you?” he asks as we lie facing each other in the same position we fell asleep in last night.

“No, I was awake.”

His eyes search mine before he uses his finger to swipe away the hair covering half my face and tuck it behind my ear.

Okay, that little flutter is turning into a riot.

“How are you feeling this morning?” he asks.

I exhale a breath through my nose, conscientious of my morning breath. “Honestly, I’m not sure. I’m feeling a little of everything right now. Scared, relieved, pissed, acceptance. It’s all tangled inside at the moment.” Giddy with excitement that I’m waking up next to you. That one is definitely mixed in there too.

“That was Finn on the phone. Alessia is on her way with some breakfast and coffee from her favorite café. I think she wants to have a little time with you. Make sure you’re really okay since she’s the only one you kind of knew when you walked in here yesterday.”

I smile, grateful that she’d take it upon herself to reach out, especially after my brother nearly kidnapping her.