Page 10 of It Never Was

"That's just it, Ryen. You didn't fucking think," he grits through his teeth, the smell of alcohol potent on his breath.

My whole-body winces.

I've heard his voice like this before, but it never gets easier to hear, especially with my face being pulled to his this close. My stomach begins to twist again, this time nausea settles deep in my bones. These aren't the butterflies I yearn for.

This is…fear.

My emotions must have been painted on my face. He crashes his mouth against mine bruisingly hard and deep like he is trying to punish me with his kiss. It takes me off guard, the emotions swirling inside me. Scared, confused, and also hungry for more of his kiss.

What is happening?

Breaking his lips from mine, he pulls me into his arms, squeezing hard like I will fly away if he lets go. "I was just worried is all." He kisses the top of my head. My body relaxes as he does the same. "Let's go inside, huh?" His voice softly moves through my hair, but that hint of danger still lingers in my ear.

I nod.

Devon guides me to the door, his hand not leaving the small crevice of my lower back. I start to unlock the front door, his arms wrapping fully around my waist as he steps behind me pushing my hair to the side behind my shoulder exposing my neck. His lips gently glide along the base of my neck. My body shivers at the softness of his lips, bringing the heat between my legs alive.

God, I am thankful my mother is never home.

I let myself fall into his touch. Savoring the fact that he isn't upset anymore.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean it to come off so harsh. I was just so worried, you made me worried," he whispers against my skin as he nips my neck.

Shivers erupt down my spine, and the wetness in my core grows.

"I know, it's okay," I breathe out as his lips drag up my neck to my jawline right when I push the door open.

Before I can fully open the door, he shoves me through the doorway, spinning me around to face him, caging me against the door as he closes it behind me. Pressing his weight against me, he grabs my hips and grinds them into him.

The butterflies I craved enter my stomach, creeping up my chest.

His forehead is on mine now looking down at me with heated eyes as he brushes his thumb along my bottom lip.

"You are so beautiful, Ryen McKenny." His words paired with his touch are all it takes for a faint moan to fall from my lips.

Another gentle kiss meets my mouth, and his hands grab my ass, pulling my legs around his hips to straddle him as he walks towards the staircase. His kiss grows harder with each step up the stairs. I can't control myself. My hips buck into him for friction. He growls into my mouth in return. Slamming me against the wall, his hardness presses between my legs, and I can feel just how much he wants me.

God, I need more.

More of this.

Not the arguing or venomous words.

Not the bruising touches or fear in my gut.

This. Right. Now.

That's what I need from him.

I push my fingers through his hair, his golden strands soft between my fingertips. He makes his way fast into my room, kicking the door closed with his foot before tossing me on the bed so he can look down on me.

This is the feeling I love, the want, the need. I have never wanted anyone as much as I want Devon.

His gaze tracks down my body and I instantly wish I was wearing something sexier for him, but instead here I am wearing jeans and a long sleeve thermal.

Comfort over style, that's me.

He takes my shoes off one by one, tossing them aside before climbing between my legs and resting the weight of his body on top of mine.

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