Page 46 of It Never Was

"No!" I blurt out in a rush. "I am just really tired. It's been a lot lately."

"What's been a lot?" He seems like he really wants to know. Not just asking to be nice or because he is feeling obligated to.

"Everything," I say truthfully.

"Well, if there is anything I can do to lighten the load, let me know. I know we just met and all…but I mean it." His hand touches my arm and I shift away, pressing my body as far away as possible. The touch was too unexpected, and I am not fully here right now. My mind flickers through multiple scenes and images.

I wiped the last tear that was able to sneak out.

"Thanks," I say, facing him slightly, but not all the way.

I can't look at him right now.

Why is he being so nice to me? It's not like he has to be, we are just co-workers. Maybe that is why. Work friends? I don't know, but it brings me comfort knowing he is there. I mean, I am not going to take him up on his offer, but I sure like the way it sounds coming from him. Like he cares.

My mind wanders to thoughts it shouldn't. Thoughts of what Parker is like in a relationship, how he acts with the person he is with. Was he gentle and soft or rough and tough? Devoted or stand offish? He is so attentive and consuming to me and I'm just his co-worker. I can't imagine how he is when he actually cares about you.

My thoughts spin.

Don't even think it. The voice spits at me from the depth of my skull.

But it's too late, my mind already thought the questions, 'what if he was my boyfriend, would he do what Devon did? Or would he treat me like all the men I read in books or watch in movies? Would he sneak little kisses just because he couldn't resist? Hold me when I when cry so I felt safe…?'

The voice hisses at me to stop. You have a boyfriend, stop being a little slut.

I stay quiet in my seat.

We drove the rest of the way without talking.

The spot on my arm that Parker touched is still on fire.

"Remember why guys are so nice to you, Rye?" Devon's voice booms in my head.

Tears start to form again, daring to pool over the rims of my eyes.

26

Parker

The moment I saw her figure this morning, I knew it was her. Her bag heavy pulled down on her shoulder, and her coffee in hand. Long black hair tied up loosely in a ponytail. The curve of her hips swaying with every step.

An overwhelming sense to protect her came over me, as well as annoyance that she would be walking to work at this time of day, willingly. I didn't mean to frighten her, but I also should have known better than to stalk up to her in my car at two in the morning.

Two in the fucking morning. Why was she walking, alone, at two in the goddamn morning?

She looked just as confused about my presence as I did hers. There was more than confusion on her face, though. Sadness. Pain. It looked as if she had cried herself to sleep. She looked defeated. An ache formed in my chest.

Why?

I couldn't get her in my car fast enough. Wondering what the hell she had been through last night. My body was tense, imagining what could have happened if I hadn't driven by. She seemed hesitant to take me up on my offer, I don't blame her, she barely knows me. But she got in anyways, and I thank the lords above for that. I wasn't leaving her to walk to work. Even if it meant I had to put her over my shoulder and carry her into the car myself, I was giving her a ride.

She seemed at ease once we started driving, her cold body warming up as the heater engulfed her and I turned on the heated seats of the passenger side. A feature that was well worth the add on price, as I watched small smirk play on her face. Her body sank into the seat slightly letting her nerves go, but just as they dissipated, they returned, remembering she was in a stranger's car.

New co-worker…. acquaintance?

Whatever, I was.

I also didn't seem as annoyed as I felt when she entered my car. Drilling her with questions like she was a child, "So why are you walking to work?", "Were you walking long before I came around?" I didn't know why my protectiveness came out like it did at that moment. She took the questions relaxed, not getting bothered by me asking. Even after I basically asked her where she lived.

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