Page 87 of It Never Was

I snap back into fight mode bucking myself off the desk, straining to gain control of my arms from Suzie's grasp. I lean in and bite into her wrist, hard enough to break skin I think, because the taste of metallic rust hits my tongue. I don't have time to care and assess the damage as she releases my arms. Spitting out curses. I can't have Parker see me like this, it's one thing to know about my trauma, it's another to see it firsthand. I know he would save me, but he shouldn't have to.

I flip my body around and dig my nails into Devon's face, a scream lets out of his throat, and he stumbles backwards, pants still around his ankles and dick out he falls on to the bed.

Suzie has my hair in her fist before I can take a step towards the door, pulling me down to my knees, her foot kicking me down further. Cold metal crossed my cheeks with a sting. It's only now that I realize Suzie has a knife. My throat goes dry, trying to swallow doesn't ease the tightness, it just causes my breath to come more rapidly. I hear footsteps on the stairs, fresh streams of tears flow as the pounding in my chest quickens with each step I hear travel down the hallway.

"Who is here Ryen!?" Devon spits in my face as he rushes my way. Towering above me, administering another strike across in hopes of getting me to answer him. The sting lingers as I slowly bring my eyes up to him again, not fast enough apparently because Suzie takes it upon herself to jerk my head to him with a burning in my scalp from her hold.

"I don't know." I squeaked out, wishing my voice was more controlled. I didn't want them to know how scared I was.

"Go by the door!" He shouts at Suzie who waits for Devon to replace her hands with his as she walks to the door. She looks so small as she presses her back against the wall next to the door. She looks like a little kid hiding during a game of hide and seek. She even looks giddy like she is playing a game. Her knife in hand waiting for the door to creek open. I go to scream a warning but Devon's hand slaps over my mouth before I can, his own nails digging into my cheeks. A whimper stays in my throat, "Doesn't feel good, does it?" He pulls my head back and I see the red marks I left on his face. Pride develops in my chest, pride that I fought back. But the feeling goes away quickly as the sound of the door handle turning fills the room. It feels like slow motion, everything happening all at once as the door swings open. A shadow enters the room. It's too dark in the hallways to see who is fully is. My chest flutters in the unknown, but my heart calls out his name, Parker.

I am stuck on the floor kneeling as Devon holds me by the hair, hand clasped over my mouth, my body clasped between his legs. Suzie drags the knife through the air, hitting the figure in the doorway. She tugs the knife out, bringing it back down at full force as she stabs again. The figure drops to their knees. A scream leaves my lips but is muted by Devon's hold.

"I got them! I got them!" Suzie is jumping in place and clapping her hands.

"Ryen?" The voice slurs my name and is softer than I expected. My mind races, eyes trying to combat the darkness, "Ry-en?" The voice gurgles my name this time.

Sharry…it's my mother.

I try to scream for her, my throat hoarse from the attempt. But all sounds are muffled and muted from Devon's grasp on my mouth.

I start to curse her in my head. Why did she come up here? Why of all times she came to my room…

My mind goes hazy, the noises ring in my ears as the realization hits me like a log truck.

She came up to see if I was okay.

My thoughts are cut short as Devon shoots up off the floor pulling me up with him. Shoving me forward as he makes his way to where Suzie stands grinning.

"What in the actual fuck Suzie! We didn't agree to this!" He shouts at her as he looks over to my mother who is still gaping at the knife in her torso. Her body slowly sagging, the bleed starts to seep from the knife in a steady stream.

"Yeah, well plans change. “She shrugs her shoulders, the grin and heat in her eyes as she looks at my mother on the floor in front of her makes my blood curdle, "Now tie her up."

53

Parker

The storm was getting bad outside, the streetlights kept flickering as I made my way to Ryen's. I had snacks and flowers, the same pink hues as I see spread across her cheeks sometimes, my new favorite color. All the treats were ready for her, I knew she was probably studying away and hadn't eaten a decent meal, so I also stopped by Pat-a-Bun's and grabbed some cheeseburgers, fries, and extra ranch. In a perfect situation, I would have cooked her a meal myself, but since I was going to her house, I knew she didn't like to use the kitchen or any other room in that house besides her room. So greasy comfort food was the best bet.

The lights flicker again and then go completely out. The wind pushes my car harder and I tighten my hold on the steering wheel. I have to turn on my high beams to see the roads now. The raindrops are growing bigger as they smack my windshield with more force.

Fuck.

I call out to my Appleplay to call Gabe to make sure he is okay at home.

"Sup." His voice is calm which makes the worry in my stomach subside.

I take a breath, eyes still fixated on the road I can barely see, "Is the power out there?" I ask.

"Yeah! And right in the middle of a mission too!" He replies with annoyance in his tone.

Gabe and his fucking video games, I shake my head but only slightly trying to make sure I don't swerve and crash in this storm.

"You at Ryen's yet?"

"No, but I am getting closer. If you need anything just call me, okay? Her house is close, we will just head back over there if we need to."

"Okay dad." I know by his sarcasm he is rolling his eyes at me through the phone, "I'm fine. Spend time with your girl."

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