Page 50 of Enjoying the Band in Lockdown

“Hear me out. I want to sleep with you.”

“Not gonna happen.”

“Out here, on the couch. It’s big enough for two. No fucking, just sleeping.”

I refused to acknowledge or answer Jax, and Xavier continued the best boyfriend in the world routine. But just like the kisses on the hour had gotten inside my head, so had the idea of curling up with Jax on the couch.

By early afternoon, I’d left Xavier to work on the new songs. Deciding to concentrate on my online poker career from the sun and solitude of the beer garden. The idea of spending the night on the couch with Jax no longer seemed crazy, but cute.

By dinner, I was watching Jax with fresh eyes. After what we’d done in the cave, could he really just sleep on the couch with me? Without wanting or trying anything at all? The idea of him not being able to sleep all night because of a boner, and then having to face the guys tomorrow, seemed cruel. Fun. Deserved.

I curled up in the corner of the couch, wrapped in a blanket and fighting a losing battle against my online nemesis while the guys practiced what could become their new opening set—once the world came out of lockdown and gigs returned.

“Are you gonna do it?” I hadn’t noticed them take a break until the couch groaned under Xavier’s weight.

“I want a night off.”

“We’ve got your back. Your body, your choice, no question.” Xavier tried to look at my phone screen, but I’d become an expert at switching screens. My secret career, just one more of my secrets.

“The couch is comfortable, and the blanket’s warm.”

“Jax would tell you his body is all the heat you’ll need.”

“Jax would be wrong.”

“So, brings me back to my first question, are you gonna do it?”

His face wasn’t giving anything away. No encouragement, either way. No invitation to join me, or invitation to go upstairs. Nothing.

“I’m comfortable here. I’ll keep playing on my phone.”

“And?”

“And after we’d spent the night down here sleeping, how’d you feel?”

“Like I wanted to drag you upstairs and fuck you senseless,” Xavier admitted. “But then you forced me to get breakfast.”

“As if I could force you to eat,” I laughed, loving our easy banter. “What if I slept down here, and you take me to breakfast tomorrow morning.”

“And Jax?”

“If he’s game enough to sleep down here, that’s his decision. But nothing’s gonna happen and tomorrow I’ll be having breakfast with you.”

“And tomorrow night?”

“Final night of the competition.”

“And then three days until the concert.”

“I heard you talking to your brother, pumped?” It wasn’t just Xavier, the whole band seemed energized after each call, as if being part of the concert had been a ticket to professional validation.

“He’s organized some cameras to be delivered here day after tomorrow. Doesn’t want me to let the family down by only streaming via phones.”

“Or, he could be proud of you.”

“Or he could be a professional, pulling together a professional concert.”

“So, you’re only doing one song?”

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