Page 33 of Liar
And her love.
God, that sounded sappy.
After cleaning, I showered and changed into nice clothes: a light grey button-up shirt and dark pants. I knew I was overdoing it, but I didn’t care.
My nerves fought to get to me as I cooked. I’d texted Ash and told her dinner would be ready at five, so I didn’t know if they’d come right at five, or beforehand, or what. For a while yesterday, I grew nervous that Ash was going to cancel this dinner date—or whatever the fuck you were supposed to call something like this—but she didn’t. Thank God. I would’ve gone crazy if she would’ve told me no.
Ash probably would’ve thought she was protecting me or something stupid like that by canceling, too. She was being the hero, trying to keep me safe. Fuck that. I didn’t need protecting. I fucked up fine on my own, and I got up on my own. This time I’d had a little help, but I didn’t need her to worry about me.
I worried about her more than enough for the both of us. I mean, her ex was a fucking serial killer, for God’s sake. You didn’t get much more messed-up than that. She’d been stalked, nearly raped, hit by a car…two of those things because of me and what I did. I wouldn’t say Brooklyn got what she deserved, but, well, let’s just say if I would’ve been around and been in my right mind, I would’ve given that bitch a piece of my mind.
I had the noodles cooking, the sauce heating up, and the chicken was a few minutes from being done in the oven when I heard the doorbell ring. It was only because I knew who stood on the other side that my heart did something funny in my chest: it skipped a beat. Or it beat faster. Whatever. Either way, I was excited. I knew I fucked up left and right last semester, but I missed seeing Ash.
Heaving a great sigh, I left the kitchen, rounding the island as I went down the hall, straight to the front door. My palms were actually sweaty; I felt like a fucking noob, going on his first date.
Only this wasn’t a date, and the girl I liked already had a boyfriend. More than one, actually.
God, this whole situation was weird, wasn’t it? Most people didn’t have to deal with shit like this, but being a Salvatore, I always had to deal with shit most people didn’t. Why not add in a polyamorous relationship to the mix of my life?
I opened the door after unlocking it, immediately meeting the stormy grey eyes of the girl who had every piece of me and didn’t know it. Ash stood wearing her usual ensemble: torn jeans, high top shoes, a hoodie over what was surely a ratty shirt, and a grey beanie over her blonde and pink hair. She did wear some makeup around her eyes, making the color in her stare pop even more.
Declan stood closest to her, on her right, Will just behind him, and Travis in the back. None of the guys looked as though they dressed up, which was fine.
Ash blinked when she saw me, a smile growing on her face as she stepped in before I invited her—typical Ash. “I didn’t know we were supposed to dress up for this,” she spoke with a grin, yanking off her beanie, causing her hair to look a bit unkempt. “You should’ve told me. I have a dress back at the dorm.”
Now it was my turn to act shocked. As the guys filed into the house and Travis shut and locked the door, I asked, “Really?”
“No,” she said. “Have you ever seen me in a dress, Sawyer? They’re not really my style. I was born wearing jeans.” Beside her, Declan chuckled as he took off his jacket.
I brought everyone into the living room, sitting them down on the couch. “Does anyone want something to drink? I have…water.” Shit. I should’ve bought something else to drink. Not alcohol, because that shit couldn’t touch my lips, but pop, or juice, or whatever the fuck it was people drank besides water.
The three guys looked uneasy on the couch, and Ash stood on her feet near the window, glancing outside. “Water’s fine,” she said, giving me a smile.
That smile held power over me no other smile ever had. That smile could make me do things I never thought I’d do. Wanting approval, wanting to be better, giving up everything that made me me these last few years. It was hard to give up the parties, the booze, the nameless sex, but it was all worth it for her. Everything was worth it for her.
I went into the kitchen, pausing when I got out water bottles. Should I pour them in glasses, or was that weirder than just giving them the bottles themselves?
As I was lost in my own thoughts, a feminine voice behind me said, “You look anxious, Sawyer.”
I nearly knocked over the bottles I’d gotten out as I turned to face her. “What? I’m not.” A lie, because I was, which was very unlike me in every single way. Ash made me feel…so different. So wanting. So lacking everything.
And to think, at first, I’d written her off immediately, wanting to simply use her to get back at Declan.
Stupid, stupid.
She did not address my blatant lie, instead checking me out. “You also look very handsome, but you always do, and you know it.”
“I’m not that confident.”
She rose a single eyebrow, a look of incredulousness on her face. “You’re not? Huh. Could’ve fooled me. After everything, I thought I had you pegged down. Smug, over-confident, sleazy, sarcastic, sometimes over the top—and your smirking—”
Half my mouth quirked into a smile as she spoke. “You have something against my smirking?”
“Maybe. I’ve never met someone who smirks as much as you. It should be illegal.”
Smirking should be illegal. I didn’t even know what to say to that. Thankfully, I didn’t have to say anything, because right then the oven dinged, my timer going off and telling me the chicken was done.
“I’ll get the waters,” Ash told me, moving closer to grab them. She started to arrange them on the kitchen table, and the others got up, chatting amongst themselves as they watched me take out the chicken from the oven and pour the pasta into the strainer over the sink.
