Page 14 of Liar
“Didn’t go well?” He picked at his salad, stabbing the lettuce with his fork, topping the forkful off with a piece of chicken before bringing it to his mouth.
I laughed. “I don’t think I’ve ever done so badly on a quiz in my life. I actually kind of hate it. Usually I’m pretty good with them, but for whatever reason, I couldn’t focus.” For whatever reason. As if I didn’t know. Fuck. I did know; I just didn’t want to admit it to Will because I knew how he’d react.
A muscle in his jaw clenched; it would’ve been attractive, had he not said what he did next: “I bet I know why. Fucking Sawyer.”
I reached for his knee beneath the table, squeezing it gently. “Hey, I know you don’t like him, but what if he’s really trying to change? You’re going to write him off forever?” I kept my hand on him, afraid that if I withdrew, he’d go wild.
Which was ridiculous, because it was Will. Will didn’t go wild.
But he did kill his father, so there was some darkness in him.
Hah. I guessed Travis was right in the beginning: everyone at Hillcrest was a monster, even the ones who only visited campus.
No, that was wrong. Dean Briggs was a liar, a pedophile, and a murderer. He went after Will, and Will defended himself. It was unfair to say that.
“My brother wanted to kill himself,” Will muttered, angrily getting more salad onto his fork. “That’s not something I can just forgive, Ash. Sawyer is an entitled dick, and even if Declan says it’s okay, it’s not.”
“Sawyer was an idiot for blaming Declan—”
“For blaming him? For fucking getting the whole school on his case while he was being investigated for Sabrina’s death?” Will spoke, bitter, his mouth full. “He was more than an idiot. He was an asshole, and for once, I’d like to see him get his.” He let out a harsh sigh, closing his eyes.
It was then I realized making everything okay with Sawyer and the guys might not be possible. Even if Declan and Travis were okay with it, Will clearly wasn’t. I couldn’t say why, but that thought kind of depressed me.
The hand on his knee moved to rub his lower back, and I leaned closer to him, whispering, “It’s okay, Will. We’ve all been through a lot, and the last thing I want is more drama. I’ll stop bringing him up, okay?”
Will’s expression lightened a bit at that; clearly he was thrilled at the thought of no more Sawyer talk.
“Anyway, like I was saying before that one was brought up—” I started, realizing it wasn’t even me who brought him up, it was Will. “—I totally bombed that quiz. If the quizzes are any indication of how the exams are going to be, I need to buckle down and practice. Corey mentioned his office hours, and I might actually have to use them.” A sigh left me as I frowned. “I’ve never had to go to a professor before for help like that, although technically Corey isn’t a professor—he’s a grad student.”
“If you need help, maybe I could—”
Will was nice to offer, but I knew math wasn’t his best subject. Dragging him into statistics with me would only lose us both down the rabbit hole. His credits had transferred, so he didn’t need to take Hillcrest’s generic courses like me. Still, he was starting over with a new major…though I had no idea what that major would be.
“No, I’ll be fine,” I said, almost sure of it. Mostly sure. “I’ll keep that in mind if I ever need private tutoring, though.” A grin grew on my lips, and my tone grew flirty. I didn’t care who heard us or saw us. I didn’t care what these people thought about me; if they thought I was some slut banging a bunch of different guys.
I loved these guys. They were my world. They were the reason I still had a world. I owed them everything, and I would give them everything for as long as I could. Fight for them, stand by them, protect them, and even side with them over my own conflicted feelings.
Sawyer would never be a part of our group. It just wasn’t going to happen.
Chapter Six – Declan
It was late on a Thursday afternoon when I sat hunched over my desk, my laptop out, headphones on my head. I was listening to music, and it reminded me of that first month last semester, when I’d tried to block out Ash and everything she was.
I failed. I failed so spectacularly, but in this instance, failing was worth it, because I got her. Ash. And now that I had her, I would never let her go.
I searched Hillcrest’s online scholarly database for some articles to use for one of my term papers. Ash was still in class, but she’d get out soon. She was spending tonight with me. It wasn’t like we alternated days, but we did try to get alone time with her every now and then. Spending all our time in a group was…definitely jarring, at first. I was a lot more okay with it now, but Will still wasn’t. The only one Will liked seeing with Ash was me. My older brother, still as protective as ever.
But I supposed it was for good reason. He’d killed Dad.
Dad was…not the father I thought he was. He wasn’t the man I believed him to be. How could he have been with Sabrina? How could he have killed her? My mind still had a hard time wrapping around that fact, but with Dad in the ground, it wasn’t as if I could ask him for clarification, for his reasoning.
And Sabrina—had she ever loved me? Call me a wuss, but hearing that she’d slept with my dad, in addition to all the others like Travis, I couldn’t help but wonder if the problem was me.
The scar on my wrist itched, and I moved my hands off the keyboard of my laptop to trace a finger over it.
No. That was my insecure side talking. That wasn’t me. I wasn’t that Declan anymore. I would be a better person for Ash, for Will, for myself. I wouldn’t let the doubt in my mind nag me until it drove me crazy.
I was about to return to my work when my phone lit up. It sat beside my laptop on my desk, and the moment its screen came to life, my heart skipped a beat. Ash. It had to be Ash. Ash, telling me she was on her way, asking if I wanted her to pick up dinner at the union before coming home.
