Page 43 of Reckless
I’d always looked at my brother and tried to be like him. I thought, if my mother could see us both as the same, maybe she wouldn’t hate me. A childish dream, but it was one that had stuck in my head, even as I’d laid there in that hospital bed.
“And so I told them I was Jacob Hall, and that I thought it was my brother, David, who set the fire,” I said. “I told them that David was a little off in the head, that Mom had been homeschooling him for years—to ask anyone around here to back me up. And so they blamed the fire on David, and I was sent to live with foster parents, since they couldn’t get ahold of any relatives.”
Jaz’s dark brows came together, and I could tell she was struggling to put it all together.
“Jacob always wanted to be a cop. He always wanted to go to a big city, where people always had plenty of food in their houses, so that’s what I became.” Well, what I became until Zane and Thorn fucked me over, but they were a different story. That darkness they’d claimed to sense inside me was merely the truth of what I’d done when I was younger, but unlike them, I didn’t relish in the sin. I hated myself for it.
I still did.
“Jacob…” she started, but she stopped.
“Jacob Hall is six feet under us,” I whispered, frowning to myself. “My real name is David.”
Jaz was quiet for a while, slowly bringing her gaze off the stones before us to stare up at me. I wondered if she viewed me differently now, if she thought I was nothing more than a psychopath who’d set fire to his family and burned them to crisps, then lied about who he was. That’s what I was. That was the truth.
But as I cautiously met her stare, as I met those warm eyes, I felt my heart quicken. She didn’t stare at me differently; she stared at me the same way she always did, with an expression that made my body react of its own accord.
“I’m sorry you had to go through all that,” she murmured. “That’s terrible.”
I shook my head once. “I told you I wasn’t a good man, Jaz, and I meant it.” What good man killed his own family on purpose and then took the identity of his dead brother? Give me names, because I didn’t think they existed.
Jaz released my hand, moving to stand before me, between my brother’s tombstone and my body. She lifted an arm, running her fingers down my cheek, lightly touching the stubble there. “Even though what happened is horrible,” she whispered, “I don’t think you’re bad, Jacob. I mean, David?” She puckered her lips, taking on her usual spunk. “What do I call you now?”
“Jacob,” I said. I might’ve been born David Hall, but he was dead now.
“Jacob,” she repeated, nodding. “You’re not evil, Jacob. You’re not bad. You might have a little darkness in you, but I think we all do.” Jaz paused as she glanced over her shoulder at the two stones, the names on them. “What your mother did to you, what she let her boyfriend do…it was wrong. You had no one else to help you, so you did the only thing you thought you could.”
My shoulders suddenly felt so very heavy. “I wanted to die with them.”
She turned back to me, pressing her chest against mine, leaning into me, breathing me in as she hooked her arms around my neck and lowered my face to hers. “I’m glad you didn’t,” she whispered. “I’m glad you’re here with me. I’m not going to let you go.” Those lips found mine, pressing softly upon me, backing up her words.
Even knowing the ugly truth, Jaz wasn’t going to let me go. Hearing that, feeling her hold onto me, made my insides warm and my heart content. I didn’t know how she’d respond, but I never…I never thought…I guess I just thought she already had two psychos too many around her, that she’d decide she didn’t need me to add to their number.
But I was wrong. This girl still wanted me, and I’d be damned if I ever let her go.
When the kiss ended, she murmured, “Thank you for telling me the truth. Not many people do, in Midpark.”
“Technically,” I said, “we’re not in Midpark.”
Jaz lightly swatted at my chest, but she didn’t pull away from me.
Well, since we were speaking the truth now…might as well go all out.
“There’s something else I have to tell you,” I muttered, frowning and causing her to tilt her head, her black hair blowing around her face in the wind. She was a beautiful sight, even now. “You’re not going to like it.”
Jaz matched my frown with her own. “You’re not married or have any secret girlfriends, do you?”
In spite of myself and where we stood, a chuckle left me. “No, nothing like that.”
She calmed. “Good, because, if that had been the case, I would’ve flipped shit.” Never one to mince words, even if it was unladylike.
Fuck being ladylike. I’d take her as she was: wild, free, and tempting beyond all belief.
“Someone contacted me, hired me for a job. They didn’t give their name, but their money was real, and as long as I kept information coming, they’d keep paying me.” I pulled away from Jaz, rubbing the back of my neck. “I wasn’t in a good place when you came to town, Jaz. I needed the money.”
“Yes, I remember you charging me an exorbitant sum,” she mused.
Around Midpark, that kind of money was easy money. A weekly allowance for an eighteen-year-old heiress. But she wasn’t an heiress. Just a girl who’d stumbled into someone else’s mess and made it even worse.
