Page 41 of Made for You

“Me?”

She groans. “Don’t play stupid, Red. I see your game. Sweatpants when everyone else is dressed up? You always find a way to stand out. As if being made for Josh wasn’t enough. You want to know the lowest point of my great date?”

I wait, because obviously she’s going to tell me.

“When Josh wanted to talk about you as soon as we drove away. First thing out of his mouth.” She lowers her voice in imitation of him. “Is Julia okay? She didn’t look so good. Are the girls being nice to her? Is she totally traumatized?” Cam snorts. “Fuck, Julia. Fuck.”

“I’m not here to ruin things for anyone,” I say, trying to appear calm even though giddiness is bursting like a firework in my belly. Josh was thinking about me. “I just want to be happy.”

“Well, we can’t both leave here happy.”

I bite my lip. “What will you do? If you...get sent home?”

“Go back to work, I guess.”

“Do you love it? I mean, your job?”

“It’s okay. I’m a model. I do a lot of brand ambassador stuff.” She tilts her head. “What will you do?”

I shake my head, mute.

Camila brightens. “You could model, for sure. I can introduce you to my agent. He’s great.” She narrows her eyes. “How does that work? Are you allowed to choose what you do next?”

“Of course,” I say, but Cam doesn’t seem to get the real problem. It’s not how to support myself. I’ve learned enough about branding and sponsorship here to last a lifetime. It’s a question of passion. Of purpose. Will my life mean anything if I leave here without Josh? He is my reason for existing. Not a profession, not a destiny, not a divine being like Zoe was talking about. This very real, very specific man.

“This stupid moth—” I say, swatting but missing.

“Listen, honey,” says Camila. “Josh would be lucky to have either of us, but it’s not just his choice. It’s my choice, too, and yours.”

I snort a laugh. “Last I checked, I don’t have any roses to give out.”

“But you have a damn hand—to take a rose or refuse it. This is a two-way street, girl, and maybe someone needs to spell that out for you. Do you want Josh? Is he worth bending your life around? He can say no to you. But you can say no, too. There’s a lot of power in no.”

I can’t help the intensity rocking through me. “I would never say no to Josh. I—I’m falling for him. This is love.”

Her look goes gentle. “I get you. Of course love is this powerful, wonderful thing. Just...don’t assume Josh has to be your world, when there’s a whole big world out there beyond this.” Her brows shoot up. “Beyond him.”

I hate the way my stomach is turning, like it can’t find its proper place in my body. And even though this could be a strategy on Camila’s part, of trying to entice me away from Josh by dangling the whole world in front of me like a glittery bauble and saying this could all be yours if you give him up, somehow I sense it’s not. That this is a question that really might deserve my attention. And yet my heart is fighting my brain. Josh is what I want. I can’t imagine other galaxies when he’s my sun. Everything I do, feel, think—he is at the center.

Suddenly...this feels like a weakness.

But maybe love is always a weakness.

Maybe there’s nothing wrong with my intense need. Maybe Cam is too cold, too calculating, and the girl to get Josh will be the one who lets her heart lead the way.

Cam slaps her hands together and I jump in my chair.

“Got you,” she says, lifting her hand and showing me the moth-shaped stain. “Little fucker.” She flicks the small body off the porch, into the darkness.

A strange sorrow rushes through me. I’ve never seen something die before.

“Why did you do that?”

“It was bothering me.”

I frown. “What did you mean by ‘If I don’t get you, nobody gets you’?”

Camila makes a pursed-lips smile. “Well, clearly, if Josh doesn’t pick me, I’ll have to kill him.”

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