Page 30 of Not Another Love Song

Gwen would be presented to the patrons as the new first chair at the Anniversary Concert. Ava suggested purchasing a new dress for the occasion, and at the frightened look on Gwen’s face, she’d laughed and called the car to take them to Fifth Avenue. Ava had forced her into a dress with enough length at the knees to sit comfortably during the concert, but with enough sparkle for Ava’s wild imagination.

On the night of the concert, Gwen warmed up onstage while the audience filed in, scratching at the glittery material of her new dress. She used to chat with Mei and the brass section before concerts, but she’d started to feel them pull away after her promotion. Now, she sat onstage by herself, focusing.

When the lights dimmed, she waited for Ava Fitzgerald to enter. The next time Gwen played at Stern Auditorium, she would be the one backstage, waiting.

The doors opened, and Gwen listened to the cacophony. Ava turned to the first oboe and tuned the orchestra. Once satisfied, she sat.

Nathan entered and waved to the audience, throwing his hands wide for the orchestra. The musicians applauded for Nathan. It wasn’t necessary, Gwen had heard, but ever since she’d started, the orchestra would join the audience in welcoming Nathan to the stage.

He mounted the podium, and Gwen turned her eyes to the first piece.

They played through, and Gwen kept one eye on Ava, watching her elbow pull and her knee bounce when she felt the strings had gotten ahead.

At the end of the song, Nathan addressed the crowd, thanking everyone for attending the Anniversary Concert. He joked his way through a few memories of the year, and the subscribers chuckled. He introduced one of their guest singers for the night, a Broadway name Gwen didn’t know.

While she waited for the violins to begin, Gwen caught sight of Ms. Michaels and Dr. Bergman, sitting in the first tier, close to the stage. They sat with a few other well-dressed people— more board members, Gwen assumed.

From the moment the concert started, she felt the time trickling away, counting down until Ava played her final notes and Gwen took her place.

Just before Nathan reintroduced the guest singers again, to close out the performance with “Happy Days are Here Again/ Get Happy,” he took a moment and said, “I have an announcement for you all tonight.”

Gwen felt her palms sweat, bow slipping.

“You—our dedicated subscribers and patrons—will be the first to know. It’s with a heavy heart that I announce that my wife, Ava, is about to play her last piece as first violin for the Manhattan Pops.”

Gwen felt the gasping chatter like a knife through her stomach.

Ava stood and took a small bow. When the applause didn’t end, she sent an “Oh shut up,” over the din that had them all rolling.

“I’ll miss performing with her very much,” Nathan said. “I’ll miss bossing her around even more.”

The couple smiled at each other while the crowd laughed.

“But I want to introduce you to our new first violinist.”

Gwen swallowed and tried to relax her face.

“At twenty-two years old, she is the youngest violinist to take first chair not only in Manhattan Pops history, but also in every professional orchestra in the United States.”

These facts checked out. Gwen had looked it up. She ignored the crowd mumbling and cooing.

“It’s my pleasure to introduce you to my friend, Gwen Jackson.”

A light hit her. She smiled at the crowd and stood, holding her instrument awkwardly at her side. Nathan’s hand extended, presenting her. She grinned at him and gave the crowd a little shake of her hand.

The sound of applause hit her like a wave, pulling her under before letting her take a breath.

“Before the Pops, Gwen was playing violin in subway stations with her case open for tips.”

Gwen blinked. Flashing camera phones. Murmurs.

It was true, but she hadn’t known it was going to be announced to the public like that. It sounded different when he said it that way. She felt her cheeks heat, and she struggled to push away the memory of that orphan who’d needed to be good enough at violin to afford groceries.

“She auditioned for us at nineteen and blew us away. She’s been honing her craft for the past four seasons here at the Pops, and I cannot be prouder of the musician she’s become.”

Gwen felt her cheeks grow tight with her smile. There were certain facts missing from Nathan’s story. And Mabel’s voice hummed in her ears, about Nathan “discovering” Ava. But she’d signed up for this kind of exposure when she’d said yes to first chair. Part of her promotion was a marketing ploy—“a pretty picture on the brochure” and all that—so she took a deep breath and beamed back at Nathan as he continued.

“And because I knew she would refuse if I asked her in advance,” Nathan said, “I was hoping to spring on her the opportunity to play something for you all.”

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