Page 79 of Live, Ranch, Love

I don’t know whether to laugh or shout at him. Absolute idiot.

“What the fuck, mate?” Jake marches back over, fists clamped and ready. I slot myself between the two men, though I doubt my below-average-height self would do much to get in the way should this escalate.

God, this is a mess.

This is not what I need right now. Not when people are going to start arriving in an hour.

“Jake, let it go,” I demand, ire seeping into my bones again at the sight of him. That the last time I actually saw him was when he left me to run after the girl he’d been cheating on me with. It’s taking a hell of a lot of mental strength to not let those memories flood in right now. To not let them overwhelm me anymore than I already am.

“Honestly, mate,” Wyatt growls. “You deserved it.”

“Wyatt!” I snap around, my eyes practically bulging with the way I’m glaring at him. A faint throbbing pain starts to build behind my temples. “You are not helping.”

“Yeah, well, I’m not leaving until he does,” Wyatt declares, folding his arms as he steps closer to my side.

“Oh yeah?” Jake laughs, squaring his shoulders up.

I pinch the bridge of my nose. Well, that’s going to be a little bit difficult since Jake just told me he’s here for the retreat, because Rowan offered him his space without telling me. So, he’s here until I convince him to get on another plane home.

Jesus, this is the last thing I need right now.

I was feeling so confident and excited for the next trial run today, and now…

A cool layer of indifference veils me. It’s my only other option—there are so many emotions swirling through me that I think if I let myself feel any of them, I’ll drown.

Especially since I hadn’t fully worked through the heart-wrenching anxiety that hit me when I learned that Wyatt kissed me the same night he found out Holly was engaged.

I shouldn’t care. I really shouldn’t care. But I can’t deny that the past months with him have felt so liberating. Wherever I go, whatever I do, I feel like there’s a part of him with me, his voice in the back of my mind always cheering me on. Almost as if our souls are slowly intertwining just as naturally as our hands.

But that also means I’m growing more anxious about what we are, because the more days that pass, the deeper I feel myself falling for him, worryingly close to a point of no return. And for a split second when I found out Wyatt knew about the engagement the word rebound flickered through my head, even if I wish it hadn’t.

Part of me feels like neither of us want to touch the conversation of where we stand yet, because realistically, isn’t it all riding on whether this retreat actually works? And if it doesn’t… then what?

But I’ll deal with all these feelings and whirring thoughts later, because right now, I need to get through this without breaking down.

I am strong. I can do this.

“It’s fine, I can handle him,” I respond, crossing my arms to mirror Wyatt, ignoring the way Jake huffs behind me.

“Aurora.” Wyatt’s eyes gleam with the laugh of disbelief he releases. “You were about to have a meltdown back there, and now this, I don’t think you’re okay to be left alone with him.”

Meltdown. I hate that it reminds that I’m still not fully healed, that I don’t have all my strength back. It makes me feel like a burden. And I hate that he might see me that way.

I suck my teeth, taking in a deep breath, as calmly as possible, through my nose. “Yeah, well I can’t always rely on you, can I?” Wyatt’s eyes flash, his jaw growing tauter. “Please, I think it would be best if you just leave us to talk for a bit.”

He just shakes his head. “No, I don’t want him on my ranch.”

“It’s not your ranch, it’s mine.” I can’t stop myself from snapping. Because my mental stability is currently hanging by an incredibly thin, fraying thread. But I don’t miss the way Wyatt rears back, brows drawing in sharply.

I sigh, rubbing my trembling fingers across my forehead. “I’m sorry, I… I just need you to let me sort this out by myself.”

Midnight eyes flick between mine, searching. Then they close, defeat washing over Wyatt’s face as he drops his arms and sighs. He walks past Jake, who entertainingly fails to hide his flinch when Wyatt stops and points at him.

“If you make her cry, just know that I have a shotgun.”

And then he trudges down the steps, off towards his place, leaving me with Jake and a past I don’t want to face.

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