Page 84 of Live, Ranch, Love

What is it with exes turning up out of the blue this week?

“What are you doing here?” I blurt out, immediately grimacing at the way Holly’s brows draw in, hurt registering across her face. “Sorry, you just caught me off guard. Is everything alright?”

Brushing some of her blonde hair behind her ear, Holly pushes a wobbly smile out. “Um, not exactly. I could really use someone to talk to right now.”

She worries her lip, hand rubbing up her arm. I know that tick of hers too well from all the years we spent together—she’s nervous. I remember it from when she admitted she was leaving me for Easton. A couple of months ago, I would’ve been triggered by seeing her here, wondering why the universe was taunting me. But now, I feel indifferent.

“And you thought I was the best person to come to?”

Holly lets out a soft chuckle, angling her head. “Well, we were together for all those years, and our families are friends, so I’d like to think we’re still friends too.”

Clenching my jaw, I regard her for a second, noticing her bloodshot eyes and red cheeks. She’s been crying. Considering she barely showed any emotion when we were together, it’s a shock. Something must be pretty wrong.

“Please, Wyatt,” Holly begs. “I feel like you might be the only person who understands what I’m going through right now.”

“Fine,” I sigh, stepping back from the door and gesturing for her to enter. I don’t hesitate to shut the door as quickly as possible once she’s in. The last thing I need is someone seeing Holly and blowing her visit out of proportion.

Holly heads straight to the couch, settling in like she’s been over a hundred times, as opposed to the two times she stayed when I started working here, before she left me. It doesn’t even look anything like it did back then—it was just a cabin with a few pieces of furniture. Now it’s my home. And I’m suddenly so grateful that she never had any part of making it that to me.

“Can I get you a drink?” I head towards the kitchen.

“Do you still buy that honey flavoured whiskey you used to drink?” Holly spins to watch me, brows raised. She hated whiskey.

“I actually meant like a coffee.” Not really sure how close to get, I just lean against the counter. “Things are that bad, huh?”

“Coffee would be good thanks. And yes.” Holly lets out a long sigh, slumping back into the couch. She rubs a hand along her forehead.

I get working on the coffee, and neither of us say anything until I’m handing it over to her, plopping myself at the other end of the couch. With narrowed eyes, Holly stares at me for a few silent seconds, then at the space between us, corners of her lips turning down.

“So, what’s up?” I ask.

“I’m worried I’m making a mistake marrying Easton.”

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” I groan, pinching the bridge of my nose. “Seriously? You want to talk to me about whether you should marry the guy you left me for?”

“I’m sorry, Wyatt. I don’t mean to make you uncomfortable,” Holly presses on, voice quivering. “But out of everyone in this goddamn town, you know what it’s like to question the path you’ve taken and wonder if you’ve just been doing what everyone else wants, as opposed to what you truly want.”

She sets her mug down on the table and twists to face me better, pulling a leg up onto the couch. “And I just thought now that you’ve clearly moved on with your new girlfriend, we might be able to talk about this like friends.”

My head hasn’t stopped shaking, but I don’t miss the way my heart rockets, beating yes, yes, yes, when she says girlfriend. Because for God’s sake, what I wouldn’t do to make that a truth. Aurora Jones, my girlfriend, has a rather nice ring to it.

“How long have you felt this way? You seemed pretty happy last time I saw you guys together.” The last sentence comes out more genuine than I expected from myself.

“Yeah, see that’s the thing…” Holly trails off, worrying her lip again. When she catches me glaring, trying to goad her to continue, she shuffles forward slightly. “That’s when it started. When I saw you with Rory, and saw the way you both looked at each other, like you were so in love, it made me realise.”

Like you were so in love.

But that was weeks ago…

Holly continues, “You were looking at her with so much passion and intensity and sickening love, and it reminded me of how you used to look at me. How I used to look at you. We used to have so much fun, be so happy. But I don’t think Easton looks at me that way. I don’t think we have that passion like you two. Like us.”

Honestly, everything she’s saying right now is going over my head because the only word my brain is latching onto is love.

Is that what this is? Is that why Aurora’s a never-ending thought in my mind? Why I always wish I could stop time with her around? Why even when she’s doing the weirdest little happy dance or rambling about something wellness related I’m not the slightest bit interested in, I’m still so enraptured by her?

I haven’t been in love in… years. I think I’d forgotten what it felt like. Maybe even stopped myself from considering it because last time… last time it got shoved back in my face.

But somehow, I don’t think that’s going to happen this time. For some bewildering reason, with the comments Aurora’s been dropping about our future here, a part of me does actually believe that we might be able to make that vision board come true.

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