Page 44 of Loss

“What’s going on?” I question them, looking between the two men and trying to figure it out.

“There’s a reason Hunter didn’t come down with us, Baby Girl. He started seein’ someone and she’s not your biggest fan. She threw a fit when he mentioned ridin’ out with us. Hunter hasn’t been at your apartment since you left. Shy and Savannah have been takin’ care of it for you. I’ll make sure it’s ready for you to stay in tonight. One of us will stay with you,” my dad says, his voice unsure as he looks at me and waits for me to respond to this piece of information.

“I see. Well, that’s okay. I’ll make sure he doesn’t see me when I’m home. And if I do go to the clubhouse, I’ll stay away from him. I want him to be happy and if that means we’re no longer friends, I’m okay with that. I have to be,” I tell them, my heart hurting at the loss of my best friend.

I’m honestly glad they told me now because today feels as if it’s the day to lose everything, and everyone, I truly care about and love. First Alex and now Hunter. I can’t forget about Valor, Chrome, and the rest of the guys here in Pine View. They all mean something to me and have been there as part of my family. Now, I won’t see them again because I’m going home. But, I’ll get to see my family and spend time with my sisters and everyone else I haven’t seen since coming to Pine View. It doesn’t equal out, but eventually I’ll have to be okay with what’s happening in my life.

“Tank, can you go load up Annabell’s car with her things from the clubhouse? She’s not ready to go there yet and I can’t blame her. You can drive her back in the car and I’ll load up our bikes in a trailer and we’ll drive an SUV. I’d prefer us all to ride together, but we can’t put the car and three bikes on one trailer that we’re rentin’. So, Tank can drive Annabell and Playboy will ride with me,” my dad says, putting plans in motion so when I’m discharged we can leave Pine View before anyone realizes what we’ve done and tries to stop me.

“I’m on it. Just talked to Dr. Copeland and she’s gettin’ your discharge papers ready now. You’ll be good to go as soon as they get the cast on your leg. Pretty sure they’re comin’ in now, sweetheart. I’ll see you soon,” Tank says, giving me a smile before leaving the room and heading to pack the few things I brought here with me up so I can go home.

Dr. Copeland and Audrey return to my room and keep the door shut while they wrap my ankle and let the cast set. I’m given strict instructions that my dad and brother listen to intensely. I know they’ll call me out if I do anything I’m not supposed to. So I have to be on my best behavior. My mom and Savannah are gonna head over to my apartment now to get things ready for me to stay there tonight and make sure I’ve got food. If I know my mom, I’ll have a full blown meal waiting for me to heat up and eat once I’m home. I can’t wait honestly because I miss my mom’s cooking more than I thought I would.

With the scrubs on me still, I sign the papers I need to leave the hospital. My dad goes out and talks to Red who’s been guarding the door. While I was waiting for the cast to set and finish the bag of fluids that were already started, I wrote Alex a note for him to read when he’s able to. I’m not going to have him worry that I’ve been taken again because I made the decision to go home with my family right now. And I will fully admit that I’m too scared to talk to him face-to-face without blurting out that I’m pregnant. Alex will never force me to do something I’m not ready for, but at the same time, I won’t keep his baby away from him. Our son or daughter deserves to have both parents in their life if Alex decides he wants to be a dad. It’s a gift and I won’t rob him of it. That’s simply not who I am and I could never be that kind of person.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Vault

ANNABELL HASN’T BEEN in my hospital room at all for the last week that I’ve been in here. Valor, Chrome, and everyone but Bell, Tank, Slim, and Playboy have been here every single day. I don’t know why she’s not here and obviously pushing me away. Well, I guess it has to do with the guilt she feels that I was shot and how she feels about this entire situation resting on her shoulders because of her ties to Dominic. What she fails to see is that we were going after Dominic before she moved down here. We would’ve come head-to-head with him at some point and there’s nothing Annabell could’ve done to stop it. I don’t know why she wants to take this on her shoulders so bad, but that’s who she is.

Today I’m getting the fuck out of here and Valor is with me in the room when Red walks in. He hasn’t really been around this week either. I’ve had them riding out making sure no one else is selling that shit Dominic was pushing around Pine View and that we won’t have any backlash from taking out Dominic and the other two fuckers. Red has been leading the men out searching for them and I know that’s more important to him right now because he hates hospitals as most of us do. Red doesn’t just hate them though. He loathes them and goes out of his way to avoid being in one as often as he can.

“Vault, I forgot all about this with everythin’ goin’ on over the last few days. Annabell gave me this for you,” Red says, walking up to the bed and pulling out paper from his cut.

Grabbing the paper from him, I open it and hurt from Annabell’s words. My Angel has left and gone back home.

Dear Alex,

I’m so sorry that you were shot. All of this is my fault and there’s nothing you or anyone else can say to make me change my mind. Dominic is the one I was with in college as you know. I knew then he wasn’t a good man. If I had gone to my dad, Playboy, or anyone else about him he wouldn’t have been able to move to Pine View to start pushing the drugs that were hurting so many in your city. Instead, Hunter is the only one who knew about him and I made him promise me that he wouldn’t tell anyone about what happened to me.

Right now, I have to go back home. I can’t be here and watch you lay in that hospital bed every day in pain and hurting because of me. So, in order for you to heal and have the peace you need, I’m going back with my dad so you can move on and figure out what you need to do moving forward. I’m not giving up on you, but right now we both need some time to ourselves so that we can figure out what we need to do moving forward.

I do need to talk to you about something at some point soon, but now isn’t the time. Once you’ve healed and are back on your feet we can talk and you’ll know what I just learned. I don’t know what I can say to tell you how sorry I am even before you know what’s going on. Just know that nothing was done on purpose and I will never do anything you don’t want done. I will be moving back to Pine View at some point, but the timing all depends on you and you’ll understand when we eventually have our talk.

I’m sorry I’m leaving you with just this note while you’re in the hospital. I couldn’t bring myself to come look at you and know I’m the cause you can’t ride for even longer now. I want you to know that I truly love you and I’m leaving because of the love I feel for you. It might not make sense to you, but it does to me. In my mind, I’m taking away the constant reminder of why you’re there and not at work or doing whatever else you’d be doing when you’re not in the hospital.

Love Always,

Your Angel

“What’s goin’ on, Alex? Where’s Annabell?” Valor asks me, sitting up straighter in the chair he’s occupied since I’ve been here.

“She left. Went back home to Benton Falls. Somethin’ more is goin’ on with her, but I don’t know what it is. Here, read it,” I whisper, handing my brother the note as I feel myself dying on the inside because she left instead of coming to talk to me about this.

I don’t give a fuck what Annabell’s going through, I’ll always be there to talk to her and help her no matter what’s going on. This entire situation is fucked up and if I can’t talk to Annabell she’s only gonna drive herself insane with everything filling her mind. I need to be there to talk through this shit with her and no one’s gonna fucking stop me from being there for her.

“Fuck, Alex. What are you gonna do?” Valor asks me, his voice full of hurt because he knows I’m not the only one hurting right now. Annabell is too and she’s cut herself off from us without a thought about how we’d feel.

“You know what I’m gonna do. Get me the fuck outta here, Zach. We’re goin’ to Benton Falls so I can get my girl back. My Angel will fuckin’ get lost in her head and drive herself crazy if I don’t go to her now. And the longer she holds this secret back, the harder it will be for her to tell me what it is,” I state, motioning for Zach to help me get out of the bed and into the sweats Chrome got for me to put on so I can leave here.

“Who are we takin’ with us?” my brother questions me, knowing I’m not gonna leave a skeleton crew here in Pine View to go home and grab my girl to come home with us.

“Chrome, Crab, Buzz, and Court. I know I should leave Chrome here as the VP, but he needs to come with us. I want my best friend with me when we go home,” I tell my brother, knowing I said I’d never return to Benton Falls again because of everything it reminds me of.

“Okay. Let’s get the fuck outta here then,” Valor states, helping me into the wheelchair I know is mandatory to leave the hospital. “I’m gonna put your cut in the truck so you have it when we get to Benton Falls. You can wear it once we get there.”

Nodding my head, I pull out my phone when it starts vibrating in my pocket. Seeing Slim’s name on the screen, I answer immediately and put it to my ear so no one in the hospital can hear whatever he’s calling me about.

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