Page 16 of Mob Star

“Little girl.”

She doesn’t shy away from that. I’ve heard Dillan call Mair that. It seemed sweet, but I didn’t give it much thought. I know his proclivities since they’re the same as mine and the other guys. None of us are into DDLG, but we like our kinks.

But it’s not that. That word isn’t about domination and submission. It’s not because Dillan thinks Mair is a child, and I definitely don’t think Thea is. She’s all woman. It means I want to take care of her and protect her from this world— not just my life. She’s physically smaller than me, too. I’m taller. My shoulders are broader. I’m stronger.

“Like how Shemar Moore calls the IT genius woman ‘baby girl’ on the TV show?”

“Yes. I don’t see you as anyone younger than who you are. I’m not looking for that. I know some couples with that relationship, but I’m not a Daddy Dom.”

“But you are a Dom, aren’t you?”

“Why do you ask?”

“You brought up a BDSM dynamic most people wouldn’t know about. You radiate that kind of control.”

“You looked down earlier. You didn’t object to me putting you on my lap, and you haven’t tried to get up. Are you a sub?”

“Answer my question first, Finn. Don’t deflect. Don’t decide how you want to answer based upon mine.”

My eyes widen. “I wasn’t. I got curious and forgot you’d asked. I am not a Dom with any kind of arrangement. I’ve never been in a committed BDSM relationship of any kind. Thea, I haven’t been in a committed relationship since I was a junior in college. My life isn’t conducive to that romantically, and I’m not interested in that purely sexually. But I have a dominant personality, and I know you can understand why. I don’t expect you to be a sub.”

“But you’d like me to be.”

“No.”

“You can’t easily put two dominant people together. One of them has to submit.”

“You can submit without being a submissive. I don’t want you to obey me, and I’m not into domestic discipline. You can argue with me, and you can do the things you want. I want an equal.”

“But you want me to submit to you intimately.”

This conversation just went from zero to sixty in one-point-five seconds. We may as well discuss it because if we can’t agree on this now, then we won’t agree on it later. I’d rather we’re on the same page before we even go on our first date than have a great time going out on a few dates, then discover we don’t want the same things.

“I think we both want that.”

She watches me for what has to be at least a minute.

“You said you don’t want domestic discipline. But you would like to spank me. You would like to command me if we have sex.”

“Thea, if we date, there is only one instance where I will ever spank you as discipline. If you endanger your life or others. I won’t tolerate it. There are precautions we will have to take because you don’t know this life yet, and there are dangerous people in this world. If you stay with me, you will learn how to navigate this. Whether you knowingly or accidentally endanger yourself, I will spank you. Hard. If you do things that risk the lives of men assigned as bodyguards, I will spank you. Hard. But if you don’t want to do something, I won’t punish you for saying no. I admit I’ve had some kinky fucking thoughts about you.”

“I’ve had some kinky fucking thoughts about you, too. I’ve never been in a submissive relationship. Not romantically or purely sexually. But I have been— am —into BDSM. Not with every partner.” She gives me a pointed look that means Tony. “I have submitted physically and to an extent mentally. But I see my submission as not a true power exchange. I always have the right to say no. It’s my choice what I submit to. I still have control of myself, and I suppose I have control of the situation.”

“You do. I may take the lead and control what we do, how we do it, and even when we do it. But you can always express what you do or don’t want. And you ultimately have the last word. I will never ignore or refuse your limits. If this isn’t what you want now, or it becomes something you don’t want later, then you tell me. Thea, I don’t have to have this part of a relationship to want a relationship with you.”

“A relationship?”

“We are not negotiating sex, and you know that.”

“True. You said you haven’t been in a relationship since you were— what —twenty-one— twenty-two. Did you have this conversation with that person back then?”

“No. We sensed we were into similar things, but I knew she wasn’t someone I would be with for long. She wasn’t someone I thought I could share my life with. My real life. She saw what I wanted her to see.”

“You want me to see the good, the bad, and the ugly.”

“Never the ugly. You may have a clue what that is. But I will never tell you. I was honest when I said I don’t want to lie to you. That doesn’t mean there aren’t times when I will. I will lie about where I am, who I’m with, and what I’m doing. I will lie to keep you safe, to keep my family safe, and to keep the people who depend upon me safe.”

“You didn’t say you would lie to keep yourself safe. You didn’t forget to say that. You put other people ahead of you. You aren’t selfish. You’re a leader.”

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