Page 139 of The Moment You Know

“We both had to live with it.”

Paige lifted her shoulder in a shrug, conceding his point. “The sad thing is that the rational part of my brain knew your desire came from a good, loving place, and you weren’t going to see my naked body and then assault me. But the part of my brain that held my secrets and remembered all the bad shit that happened with Carter—it was driving the bus and trying to protect me, even when it didn’t need to protect me fromyou. Unfortunately, it didn’t differentiate between sex with you and being violated by Carter, so my reactions were ‘one size fits all’.”

David reached over and covered her right hand with his left.

Paige looked down at his hand on hers, smiling a little before meeting his eyes. “That made taking back ownership of my body a priority. I tried a Pilates class and really liked it, so I signed up for more and it helped in ways I wasn’t expecting. My mental state improved, my stress levels decreased, and it fundamentally changed the way I looked.

“It was sort of like being re-born. I was now completely in tune with my body and knowing I finally owned it, was beyond empowering. I’d never felt anything like it. The first time I really looked at myself in a mirror andlovedmy body, I cried. It was … a defining moment.”

David watched her speaking—so animated and comfortable—and as had been the case several times in the past few weeks, he was astounded. He almost didn’t recognize the woman before him and it occurred to him she was probably close to being the Paige she would’ve been had Carter not molested her.

He was so focused on his thoughts that he missed the first part of what she said next.

“… went shopping for clothes and that was harder than you’d think. I didn’t have a good idea of how to dress myself and the stuff I picked out and bought? Well, let’s just say that later in my apartment, when I was modeling the very first outfit for Jules, she practically ripped it off me and shoved it back in the bag. Then she drove me back to the store and made me return everything I’d bought. She was a little unhinged, to be honest.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“You be nice,” Paige scolded him, but completely missed the mark by laughing. “Have you forgotten she was responsible for getting us together?”

He thought about that for a second, then shook his head. “I’d have come over and talked to you eventually.”

“Maybe. But she still got us together before you did that. So she’s ultimately responsible for us getting together. The facts are the facts, whether you agree with them or not.”

“Whatever,” he said dismissively. “So … she was a little unhinged?”

Paige put a hand to her mouth. “Oh, my God. It was so funny! She dragged me all over the store, throwing clothes at me and making me try them on. She basically decided what I was going to buy or not. At one point, when I was arguing about a shirt I thought was too tight, she yelled, ‘Your tits are crying out to be seen! They need to be shownrespect! You’re not allowed to wear any more shirts that make you look like you don’t have tits, because youdohave tits and they’re still pretty good. Understand? I forbid you from wearing anything that fits you like a freaking tent, ever again. I want to be able to tell that you have tits, no matter what you wear’!”

David couldn’t help but laugh and Paige joined in. When they stopped, she continued. “I’m pretty sure everyone in the store heard her and I thought I was going to die from embarrassment. But then I told myself I’d never see these people again—at least I hoped not—and in the end I decided she was right. My tits are still pretty good, so … yeah. Tight shirt? Bought it.”

He grinned at her and then said, softly, “They’re more than pretty good.”

The second the words were out of his mouth, he froze. Her saying things about her tits was allowed, but washeallowed to make comments? Probably not, because he was a man (not to mention, her ex-husband), but it had just slipped out.

Instead of being offended and clocking him, Paige smiled and tilted her head downward like she was listening to something. After several seconds, she looked back up. “They say ‘Thank you’.”

“They’re welcome,” he returned, deliberatelynotlooking anywhere near her chest.

She gathered their plates and then got to her feet. “The next installment of my recovery story involves pornography, so let me get you another beer.”

He stared after her as she walked away. Pornography?

Chapter 53

A few minutes later Paige returned and handed David the Cardigans of the Galaxy Double IPA.

“You were saying something about pornography?” he asked as he poured it into his glass.

She sat down, drawing her knees up. “Once I owned my body, the next step was to own my own pleasure and my therapy sort of got pornographic,” she said, using air quotes around the word ‘therapy’. “In my spare time, I started reading historical romances—”

“Oh, Jesus,” he groaned. “My mom reads that shit all the time. Practically every book she reads is about a duke seducing a governess, and that’s not an exaggeration.”

“I went through a duke and governess phase, myself,” Paige admitted, only slightly embarrassed. “It lasted a couple of months, followed by a western historical romance phase, which surprised me. I had no idea cowboys on a ranch would be so compelling, but they really are.”

David took a drink of his beer and said nothing.

“Anyway,” she said, interpreting his silence to mean he didn’t give a shit about cowboys on ranches (compelling or not). “I also started reading a lot of contemporary romance, too.”

“Like Fifty Shades of Grey?”

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