Page 42 of The Moment You Know

A few minutes later, she was blindly making her way to the bathroom, almost going into the men’s room by mistake. Once inside the correct bathroom, she locked the door and then leaned back against it, shaking with hurt and pain, tears coming immediately, as she was no longer able to keep them at bay.

Paige didn’t know how long she cried, but when she finally had some control back, she went to the sink and looked at herself, only to wish she hadn’t. Her face looked like a war zone, her eyes red and puffy from crying, her mascara now streaked to hell and back. She splashed cold water on her face several times to try and reverse some of the damage before getting a few paper towels wet and removing all traces of mascara.

When she had done all she could do, she took two Advils from the stash in her purse and tossed them back, not even bothering with water.

She just needed to get home. And then she could really fall apart.

Head down to avoid eye contact with the receptionist, Paige left the building and when she stepped outside, the last person she expected to find sitting on one of the benches was David.

He was hunched over, with his forearms planted on his thighs, and when he saw her he stood up slowly, as if it took substantial effort. He was dressed in black slacks and a dark gray button-down shirt, an almost funereal combination that fit the day perfectly, while she looked like she was going to a freaking job interview.

“Did you sign the papers?” he asked, coming to stand in front of her.

“Yes, but—”

“Good.”

“David, you shouldn’t have done that.”

“I wanted to. You love that house and it’s important to me that you have it.”

“You love it, too.”

“I do,” he agreed quietly. “And this way we both don’t lose it.”

“I really love you,” she told him, starting to cry again as the smell of his Hugo Boss cologne surrounded her.

“I love you, too,” he said, taking her face in his hands and then surprising her by kissing her on the mouth. He kissed her probably longer than he should have, but it still wasn’t long enough. “I’m sorry I couldn’t stay,” he whispered, his voice full of regret as he looked down at her. “Goodbye, Paige.”

“Goodbye, David.”

Numb, she pressed her fingers to her mouth and watched him leave. He had parked at the other end of the parking lot from her and her eyes followed him all the way to his car; he didn’t look back, which she was both grateful for and hated.

She stood there, long after David had driven away, before slowly making her way to her own car. Once inside, she stared out the front windshield for several minutes before summoning the energy to start the car and begin the drive to the house that was now hers. Halfway there, she decided to make a quick detour at a liquor store, where she bought two bottles of wine, hoping it would be enough.

At home, she had barely parked in the driveway when a knock at her driver’s side window startled her. It was Marilyn, her next-door neighbor.

With a sigh, Paige got out of the car and was immediately enfolded in a hug by the tiny, older woman.

“How are you?” Marilyn wanted to know, her concern evident.

“Today was a little rough, but I’m okay,” Paige lied, forcing herself to smile at the woman who regularly brought banana bread over, as well as her amazing homemade applesauce.

“Oh, my dear girl, if you need anything, you let me know. I’m always here, unless I’m at bingo, but that’s only on Thursday nights.”

“I will. Thank you.”

Paige went inside the house and before she even had the front door closed and locked behind her, Spook, the black cat she and David had adopted from a local shelter, was at her side, rubbing against her legs. Mindful of the cat, she carefully stepped out of her heels, leaving them next to the entryway table before heading into the kitchen, Spook eagerly following. Paige set the bottles of wine on the counter and a moment later Spook jumped up and sat next to them, awaiting his dinner.

“Hungry?” she asked, rubbing her hand down his back, his silky black fur looking almost blue in the light.

He meowed and looked at her with luminous green eyes, watching as she opened a little can of his ridiculously expensive cat food and spooned it into his food bowl.

While he ate, she grabbed a corkscrew and opened one of the bottles of wine. For a moment, she considered just drinking straight from the bottle and saving herself the hassle of washing a glass later, but decided against it, because she wasn’t a savage. She got a wine glass out and poured herself a full glass, then immediately took a long drink without letting the Merlot breathe first. With one hip pressed against the counter, she drank her wine while Spook ate and when he was done, she picked him up and set him on the floor. Then, with her wine glass in one hand and the opened bottle in the other, she wandered around the small house, looking in each room, as if with new eyes.

All traces of David were gone, with the exception of the furniture they had picked out together, and some pictures of the two of them displayed on the mantle that David had sanded and stained with painstaking care.

With Spook trailing behind her, Paige’s final stop was the master bedroom. Exhausted, she sat down on her side of the bed and set the wine bottle on her nightstand. Then, unable to stop herself, she opened the nightstand drawer and took out a small, framed ultrasound picture and with a gentle finger, traced the blurry image of what had been hers and David’s baby boy.

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