Page 34 of Twisted Heathens

“To cut a long story short, I made a deal with our parents. They’re very active in local government and were able to cut a deal with the authorities in exchange for some fairly substantial donations to Blackwood’s program. I was given a free ride to this place, able to continue my studies online and also keep an eye on Hudson. Try and help him get better.”

Her eyes are wide. “You did that for him? Seriously?”

I look away, feeling a hot blush rising from my shirt collar. “Yeah, he’d do it for me. It’s not so bad, I help out with the admin and a couple classes, as you know. It’s worth it to be there for him, even when he treats me like shit.”

“That’s why you’re given free reign,” she hums, finally catching on.

“Pretty much. But that stays between us, okay?”

Brooklyn nods her agreement, easing my nerves somewhat. “So, you’re… uh, normal?”

“Well, I don’t really care for that word, but sure. I’m here voluntarily.”

She stares at me like I’m a puzzle she just can’t fathom, eyes searching with calculation that makes me nervous. “You don’t take meds? Or go to therapy?”

“Ah, not so much. I actually help out in the pharmacy a bit too, it’s good experience.”

Her eyes seem to light up momentarily, like she’s clocking something. I wait for her response but none comes, she’s deep in thought about something.

“What about you?” I ask gently.

“Me? Haven’t you read my file?”

Fuck, she’s got me down alright. “Ah, no. I actually haven’t.”

“But you could have?”

I nod. No point in lying about it. I did with the others, but something about her has led me to hold back so far. Some faint hope that maybe she’d tell me herself, given time.

“I… I did something,” she utters. “Something unforgivable.” An involuntary shudder seems to pass over her. “Please don’t make me say it.”

Taking a chance, I move to hold her hand. “You don’t have to.”

Our fingers automatically twine together, in a way that feels almost natural.

“I’m not like you, Kade. You’re a good person. I’m not.”

I shake my head resolutely. “I refuse to believe that. Look at the way you handled Eli on your first day. And standing up to Rio like that? It was a sight for sore eyes. He’s been pushing everyone around for far too long and getting away with it.”

“Those things don’t redeem me of my sins.”

That’s far more than I can argue against. This is clearly ingrained into her, a belief as corrosive as it is false. She’s internalised it so hard, I have no chance of digging the festering hatred out of her. Not like that’s going to stop me from trying.

“Nobody is all good, Brooke. We’re all somewhere on the spectrum of morality, dabbling in shades of grey. There’s no such thing as good and bad. Not really,” I explain.

Brooklyn listens intently, eyes flicking over my face. Then she shifts her body closer, gradually closing the gap between us. I dare not move, not now that I’ve gotten so far. Her knees brush mine and I can just feel her breath on my skin. “Tell me then.”

“Tell you what?” I reply.

“The worst thing you’ve ever done. I want to know.” Her fingers squeeze mine. “Promise I can keep a secret. I’ll take it to my grave.”

It comes to me easily. Too easily. My most awful source of shame. She must see it on my face, a dark smile pulling at her full lips almost with excitement. I want to tell her, on a primal level. She’s calling out to something inside, a layer of my personality that I’ve buried as deep as possible, hoping never to awaken it again. How did she find it within me?

“It was seven years ago. Right before my sixteenth birthday,” I croak.

The words burst free, refusing to be contained any longer. As I speak, her leg hooks over mine, tangling together to trap me in place. Her warmth pushes me to the edge, more shameful secrets escaping my lips.

“There was this girl, Amy Bond. Only a few months older than me. We were just kids, fooling around on our lunch breaks. Stealing kisses behind buildings and exchanging endless text messages. Within weeks, we were both besotted with each other.”

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