Page 14 of Fighting for You

“Sure, it’s not,” Kirsten giggles.

“I’m serious,” I argue, throwing a small decorative pillow from the couch at Kirsten. “We can’t mix business and pleasure together.”

She dodges the attack and sits up, laughing. “Ryder has it bad for you, Meghan. You should totally jump on that hunk of a man,” she says, wiggling her brows at me.

“He barely knows me,” I say, trying to hide a smile that threatens to give me away.

“I wish you would just let yourself live again,” Stacey adds in, her tone now serious.

“I am,” I say, but I don’t add more. We all know that I am fibbing.

“No, you are getting by,” Kirsten pipes in. “Wade would want you to be happy. Aren’t you tired of people telling you that? I get that you might not be ready to date again, but who said you can’t go out and just have some harmless fun? Sleep with him. Go on dates. Have fun. Just live,” she finishes.

For the first time in forever, I truly consider the advice someone is giving me. Yes, falling in love again isn’t something I am willing to entertain, but it might be nice to just let loose and have some wild fun. I hadn’t been touched by a man in so long, just the thought of it had my body tingling with need.

“Maybe. I will think about it,” I say to them.

That seems to satisfy them for the moment. Thankfully, they don’t notice that during the rest of our show, all I can think about is what it would be like to be under Ryder.

Chapter 15

Ryder

I barely know Meghan, but she is already driving me wild. When I first arrived in California, I never thought I would focus on anything other than my work. It has been my one and only love for as long as I can remember, but now there is something else taking up residence in my mind. At first, moving to a new city sounded awful, but it slowly worked its way into my heart. I enjoy the business aspects, but I’m close to the water with beaches nearby.

I need to get away for a few minutes, to collect my thoughts. I head to the beach, a place where I can break free from the cruel atmosphere of our world. The longer it takes me to walk down the block toward the ocean, the more my mind wanders. At times, when I am alone, I can still hear the bullets spraying toward me and my men while in combat. Other times, I can sense the pain of those around me. Like, Meghan. When she is near me, all I can see is the pain she bears but won’t speak of. I know that pain, because I’ve been there before.

Once my feet hit the sand and the rhythmic sounds of the waves crashing along the shore reach my ears, I feel a sense of calm I had been longing for. I can’t tell the guys how I’m feeling, they will never let me hear the end of it.

Sure, most of the guys have married and had kids, but they don’t really talk about their feelings. We are tough guys. But, sometimes, I just wish I could tell someone other than myself, how I feel.

I don’t know where she’s going or where her mind is, but all I want to do is join her. Ask her if she had room for one troubled soul like hers. It sounds crazy, but when I set my sights on something, I never give up. Maybe that’s why I was always so good at my job. I can hunt down a killer or an enemy with precision and incredible accuracy.

Right now, Meghan is all I see.

I finally reach the beach and I find a bench nearby. The only bad things about the beaches around the city are that they aren’t like beaches you would normally find in Virginia, the Carolinas, or Florida. But still, I get to see the water so for now, I am happy.

Sighing, I shake my head as I stare out at the open water. I dig my phone out of my pocket and stare at it for a few minutes. Shaking my head, I chastise myself for being so juvenile. I want to call her and hear her voice. Hell, I’ll even take reading her emails, just as long as I am in contact with her.

I think about the last time we talked only a few days ago when she agreed to go out with me this upcoming weekend. Saturday can’t come soon enough. At work today, I had put on my mask and been in complete hunter mode. Now, though, I wanted to relax and talk to a beautiful woman.

Realizing I wasn’t going to win the battle going on in my mind, I opened my text messages and quickly texted Meghan.

Me: Hey, I thought we could try a new type of communication.

I waited until those three little magical dots appeared. She was typing a response and I was dying with anticipation.

Meghan: Hi. What was so wrong with emails? It’s becoming a lost art.

I couldn’t help but chuckle at her response.

Me: Lost art, huh? Well, then you would enjoy my job. All I do is read emails some days. Anyway, do you have any ideas for our FRIENDS outing on Saturday?

I sat back and stared at my message. That should get her talking, but still, keep it friendly as she requested. I just hope she doesn’t expect us to hold onto this friend’s pack. I have ideas that are way outside of a friendzone.

Meghan: Do you like Italian food? There is a cute little Italian restaurant not far from my apartment.

Me: Sounds perfect. Send me the address.

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