Page 40 of The Girl in the Forest

I’d been alone and helpless, with no way to fight back. No courage left to face the bully, and a flash-fire rose so fast that my voice wavered. “Mace…”

He was right there. “What’s driving you?”

“Anger,” I gritted.

“Push it,” he said.

“Are you crazy?” I glanced around, feeling a little wild. Reckless. “Which tree should I burn down?”

“Trees aren’t your enemy. Think.” His hands braced as he studied my expression. “Are you angry with me?”

The arrogant alpha, thinking it was about him. Maybe it was.

I bared my teeth. “You made me think of Mosbach.”

“Why does Mosbach make you angry?”

Gods… there were so many reasons, and I couldn’t sort through them while the heat burned like worm poison from so long ago.

“Why, Noa?” Mace gentled his voice, but with no less command. “Are you angry at yourself?”

My teeth chattered. “I believed him—what Mosbach said. I never once questioned it. And when he touched me like I was nothing but a whore and he had every right… I didn’t fight back. I just sat there, willing to beg.”

“That made you weak?”

“I’ve always been weak. But when you laughed about me being helpless… I realized you can see the truth about me. You’ve always seen the truth.” My breath stuttered. “I told you what Mosbach said, and it makes me sick to my stomach that I did it because I wanted to hurt you.”

“I’ve said things to hurt you, Noa. And I felt bad about it, when I said them.”

“Gods, Mace.” My body was shaking.

“But I won’t apologize because I trust you enough to share my emotions. You can say anything to me. To him, too. You can trust us to take your anger and not hold it against you.”

I forced in a breath, pushed the air out. “I destroy things, Mace.”

“So do I. So does Fallon. Does that make us bad?”

“You’re not faille.”

“And you are. But you determine what that means. No one else.”

He was offering a pep talk when what I needed was some kind of catharsis, a way to rid myself of emotion I couldn’t identify.

“I destroyed a field of wildflowers,” I hissed. “Burned trees down.”

“Don’t do it next time.”

“Don’t patronize me,” I snapped.

“Hardly.” Mace snorted. “Tell me the truth. Why are you angry?”

The truth… My heart battered against my ribs. Truth hid in the nightmares that held me immobile. In the wall that had blocked my path. And I’d chosen rage instead of facing it.

“Because I’m frightened,” I whispered. “I’m alone and I hate it.”

“You aren’t alone.”

Tears still stung my eyes because I would always feel alone, and that was what drove the rage. Never belonging. Always searching.

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