Page 75 of The Girl in the Forest

Which explained their reactions. Laura, wanting someone special but not wanting to be lonely… like me. Fallon’s idea of romance made more sense now, how she’d talked about fated mates, and being ready to hear each other.

Silvered hair clung to my cheek, and I brushed the strands behind my ear. There was another question… how long he had known and kept it secret?

“When did you know?” I asked.

“The moment you rolled in the mud.” His mouth twitched. “The night you saved Levi. You glared at my wolf like you’d willingly tear his throat out. I refused to believe it—what I felt. As if something clicked into place.”

That didn’t seem right. And yet it did in an unnerving way, because he’d been so aggressive toward me. He’d said protection was an obligation and perhaps I should have learned more about wolves. How I was shooting dinner if I wanted to eat. Then he’d left me at the river, with nymphs he claimed he didn’t know about.

I’d thought he was testing me, to see if I was worthy enough to be allowed near his precious pack, and I asked, almost too tightly, “How long did you deny it?”

His eyes narrowed. “Do you need to know this now, Noa?”

“Yes.” Wanting more information was not a surrender. I needed details to force this into reality, and maybe I wanted to deny Fate her chance to gloat.

We stood on opposite sides of the room, combatants again. His arms were crossed. So were mine, and when Grayson’s jaw flexed, my spine tightened.

“When, Grayson?” My voice shook. My hands, my entire body. I was as fragile as glass and close to breaking.

“When you stood in Leo’s ruined house,” he said. “When you stepped in front of Levi’s vomit to protect him from me. I was angry. When you cried over the rabbit, I hated your tears.”

I flinched at the way his mouth thinned.

“The night you nearly died of worm poison and I had to hurt you to save you—I hated myself for doing it. When you talked to my wolf, touched him—I was furious, but he became your ally. When I could hear you screaming in a nightmare even though I was more than a mile away…”

He breathed.

“When you found the hidden passage and I thought I’d never heard a laugh as beautiful as yours. When all I wanted was to hear that laugh again. There were so many times, Noa… when you ran through carnage because you trusted my wolf. When you called me bastard with that light in your eyes.”

His voice was deep, the kind of deep I wanted when the lights were low and a fire burned in the fireplace.

“When you stood up to Metis, you scared the shit out of me. Anyone else would have broken beneath her power, but you… gods, Noa, you grew stronger, and it terrified her. A gods-damn oceanid. And each time I felt you, needed you, listened to you, I told myself it wasn’t possible. There had to be some other explanation, something I could control.”

“You knew what we were when you inked the runes.”

“I… denied it.”

“And the Night of the Beacons?”

“You walked toward me, and when you smiled, my heart stopped. You leaned against me with your hand on my waist, and I couldn’t breathe. When I put those diamonds around your throat, I knew. When you finally dropped that liar-liar chant and I burned with your terror, I… knew.”

He twisted away, raked a hand through his hair. “I wanted to kill Mosbach for what he did. When you offered to protect me, I should have explained. But I was afraid if I told you, it would be too much and you’d leave. You’d never heard of a mating bond. This shit-show between the kings and queens was something you read in the history books. I couldn’t—I thought I had time.”

When he turned to face me, his expression was bleak. “Then the Gathering happened. Azul happened, and when I pulled you from that pig, I could hear the terror ripping your mind to shreds… and every gods-fucking-thing about the ones I loved dying because of me slammed into reality. I couldn’t protect you when I was the threat.”

His voice grated as he pushed unsteady hands through his hair. “The night of the rite, watching you honor Halwyn, your strength and courage with each arrow you shot, even when your heart was breaking—you hollowed me out. I couldn’t deny you were my mate, and when you walked away, I felt every step you took like stones on my heart.”

My fingers dug into my waist as I hugged myself tighter. “You let me go.”

“I wanted you to stay away,” he gritted. “Have a happy life far away from me. I still want that.”

Nerves undid me and I demanded, “So what now, since I’m back? Do we go to Priest River and get new tattoos?”

Anger flared in his eyes. “Don’t demean yourself.”

The blood rushed into by face, but I needed antagonism between us to balance what he’d said. “Does a mating bond mean you love me? Or just lust after me?”

His canines punched down. “Did you feel me in that damn witch cave? While you were deep in that illusion? Because I was there. Holding you. Trying to reach you. Making gods-damned love to you while you thought I was someone else.”

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