Page 61 of Unofficial

Having him in her bed like this, after everything he did, makes it impossible not to wonder if letting him in again and giving him another shot would be all bad. He seems like he's changed, and she really appreciated him being here last night. But as soon as the idea pops into her head, memories of him with Lena replace those thoughts. The way he thrust into her like a jackhammer on the kitchen counter after lying and telling her he was sick. Along with those images comes the painful feelings she had for longer than she wanted. How she wanted to call him, talk to him, touch him. To remind him of how good they were together, and how big of a mistake he made.

Jess slips out of bed and reties her robe before walking downstairs. Distance. She needs distance to help keep her thoughts in focus and not get lost in the wishes from the past. But first, she needs food. Soup doesn't sound great for breakfast, but maybe there are still crackers she can snack on.

Downstairs, she opens her cabinets to find food she doesn't remember buying. Inside sits oatmeal, which sounds really bland and oddly appetizing right now. But she never went to the store to get milk, which she needs to make the mushy oats. Water just won't cut it.

Abandoning that idea, she opens the fridge and gasps. It's fully stocked. Meat, cheese, vegetables, fruit, and milk. Regular and almond. There's more food than she normally buys for just herself, and she walks backwards until she hits the counter, her eyes glued to the fridge.

"He bought me groceries. A week's worth of groceries, not just dinner. After taking care of me. He's acting almost like... like a boyfriend."

Footsteps on the stairs pull her attention from the food, and she grips her robe closed as she waits for Kade to walk into the kitchen.

"Morning, beautiful," Kade says with a sleepy smile. He always looked so damn good in the mornings. "You're looking a lot better today. You're more off-white than ghostly today."

Her hand moves to touch her cheek, and she feels herself flush. She can't believe she let him see her like that. "Thanks."

"I wasn’t exactly sure what you wanted to prep for the week, so I probably went a little crazy. I wanted to give you options once you felt better."

"Did you take my wallet?"

His brows furrow. "Excuse me?"

"To go grocery shopping. Did you use my card to pay for all this?"

The offense in his eyes hurts her. "No, Jess."

"You bought this yourself?"

"Yes."

"Kade..." The feelings hit her all at once, and she becomes overwhelmed. "You shouldn't have."

"You didn't have any food, Jess. I wasn’t going to let you wake up and starve. I know you don't think that much of me, but I'm not a monster."

Her eyes find his, and she knows she hurt his feelings without meaning to. "I didn't mean it the way it came out. I never thought you were a monster."

"I can buy you groceries. And please don't insult me by offering to pay me back. I wanted to do something nice for you."

Her heart races. This isn't going how she wanted it to, and she doesn't want to offend him. "I'm sorry, Kade."

"You're not used to me doing nice things for you," he says, his tone softening. "I get it, but-"

"No one's ever done something like this for me," she interrupts. "It's really thoughtful and kind and really confusing."

"Confusing?"

Her stomach flips, but for the first time in almost a week, it's not from her illness. "I think it might be best if you leave."

"Jess, what did I do? I'm sorry I got upset."

"No, it's not that. You, I... You have a right to feel upset. I didn't mean what I said to come out the way it did. I'm just... this is a lot, Kade."

Walking towards her, his hands cup her face. "What do you mean?"

Her lip quivers, but she won't let him see her cry again. "I need some time to think. I really appreciate everything you've done... more than you could possibly know. But I'm having trouble putting my thoughts together in a coherent manner right now, and I need some space. It's... this is all kind of a lot to take in right now."

Licking his lips, he nods. She knows he doesn't want to leave, but he respects her wishes. "Promise me you'll call if you need anything?"

"I will."