Page 75 of Sin

Footsteps echo on the concrete, and I look up to see Noah coming around the corner of the building.

“What the fuck was that?” His voice is low and controlled, but his eyes are full of fury.

He must have heard that whole conversation.

I swallow hard. My throat is so dry. “There’s a lot…” I shut my eyes. “A lot I haven’t told you.”

He huffs out a humorless laugh. “Yeah, it sounds like it.” He takes a step closer, his eyes growing wide. “What did Lily mean?”

I flinch at the sharpness in his tone. “About what?”

“Don’t give me that. What did she mean about Mason? She called him a rapist.”

I rub my hand over my damp forehead. “You’ll have to talk to her. It’s not my story to tell.”

He crosses his arms over his chest. “You’d better fucking tell me now. Or else our friendship is over.”

Pain shoots into my chest, but it barely registers. The feeling is only a dull throb. After losing Lily, I’m like a ghost. The world around me continues to move, but I’m disconnected.

“That’s your choice.” My voice is as lifeless as I feel. “I can’t betray Lily.”

He scoffs. “I can’t believe you. I don’t even know who you are. What did that mean when you said this thing between you wasn’t going to work. Were you in some kind of relationship with her behind my back?

I let out a heavy sigh. “Yes.”

He scowls. “How serious was it?”

I swallow. “Serious. Well, I should say…it was serious for me.”

Noah’s mouth drops open, his shock so palpable I could reach out and touch it. “Oh fuck.” He sets both hands on the top of his head. “Oh, holy fuck. You lost your virginity to her, huh?”

I can only nod.

He doesn’t respond. Instead, he turns away and starts pacing the concrete in front of me. “Oh, shit.” He halts and looks at me for a moment but then starts pacing again. “So many lies. I can’t… I seriously don’t even know you.”

I shut my eyes. “I’m sorry.”

His footsteps halt. When I open my eyes, he’s glaring daggers at me. “Sorry isn’t enough. You’ve been lying to me. You. The most trustworthy person I know. I can’t believe this.” His expression shifts from anger to disbelief. “She was raped, and you didn’t tell me… You lost your virginity to her… I didn’t even have a clue.” As if a thought occurs to him, his face hardens. “You punched Mason tonight for her, huh? Because you knew what he did to her.”

When I don’t respond, he clenches his hands into fists. “Answer the question.”

I raise my chin, refusing to let him guilt me into a confession that isn’t mine to give. “I told you. Ask her.”

“She’s my fucking sister, Ethan,” he shouts. “I’m the one who’s supposed to take care of her. Fuck, I’ve been living with Mason. The man who raped my sister.” He shakes his head, his eyes growing unfocused. “I could have smothered that motherfucker in his sleep.” His gaze snaps to my face. “Why didn’t she tell me?”

I inhale an unsteady breath. “It’s not my place to tell you her secrets.”

“Secrets.” Noah releases a long, measured breath. “So many secrets. I feel like we were never friends.”

When my throat grows tight, I cough to clear it. “You’re the best friend I’ve ever had.”

His eyes flash. “Well, you’re not mine. Not if you could lie to me like this.” He shakes his head. “I thought you were the best guy I knew. If I thought you had any interest in her, I might have…” His jaw hardens. “But now I know you’re a fucking liar. All your morals and Bible thumping. It’s just a cover, huh? You preach about doing the right thing, but when it comes down to it, you’re just a lying dirtbag. You probably kept Lily’s secret from me just because you wanted to please her. Just so you could get her into bed with you.”

A spark of anger ignites within me, injecting a surge of energy into my lifeless body. “No. I love her.”

He scoffs. “I don’t believe it.” He takes a step back, the disdain clear in his eyes. “You’re saying that to try to make up for all your lies.” With that, he turns on his heel and marches away, leaving me standing alone in the dark.

I just lost my best friend in the world. Why is there only a faint throb in my chest? Probably because I lost the ability to feel when Lily said goodbye.

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